That's On Point: The Web Site

Pass.

"Why are we discussing a handshake?!?" -- Steve McManaman (paraphrased on ESPN2)

Mercifully, as I sit down at my laptop Sunday morning the tiresome, Patrice Evra/Luis Suarez incident might finally be behind us, of course, until the clubs meet again next season. About 24 hours after the Uruguayan lightning rod snubbed the outstretched hand of the former French captain, he issued an apology to the Liverpool website saying he was wrong not to shake his hand -- most likely at knifepoint from the club's directors and sponsors after the Anfield image took a massive trip through the mud over.

Maybe we can all move on, because this sorry, sad incident has left everybody involved looking a whole lot worse, particularily Liverpool manager Kenny Dalglish who had to spend months publicly backing Suarez after his alleged racial slurs on the field against Evra in a match last year. The tribalism of soccer in England, though, consider many Liverpool fans, even if its a small percentage, to think this is all some conspiracy against the club.

And from the files of two wrongs don't make a right, Evra -- the initial victim in all of this -- didn't come off smelling like a rose either, trying his best to incite a riot after Manchester United's 2-1 win on Saturday at Old Trafford by winding up the crowd.

Frankly this is as much as I really want to write about this whole scenario. Non-sports related controversy has always irked me. I remember back in 1994 getting up in the morning before school to watch "SportsCenter" (yeah, we did that back then) to watch college basketball highlights only to get months and months of the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan nonsense. Didn't understand the media frenzy then and now that I'm older the fascination and focus on the unsavory only angers me.

It's a shame, isn't it, that the amount of ink -- actual or digital -- wasted on the Suarez/Evra affair will pale in comparison to the best sports story of the year, well, aside from unheralded Jeremy Lin scoring 20 points per game during February NBA action -- Zambia winning the African Cup of Nations.

Part of me is grateful that (most likely) some of Liverpool's American(*) owners stepped in and got Suarez to finally accept some accountability for the incident in the first place, although he's never apologized for his alleged racial slur on Evra in the first place. At the same time, unlike John Terry, Suarez faced a tribunal of sorts, served out his eight game ban. He's been punished by the sport's ruling body. It's time to move on.

Suarez, not that he probably cares too much, is probably going to find himself, in certain quarters, thrown in the same bin as the Ty Cobbs of the world -- talented, great players with unsavory personalities although we don't know if the Georgie Peach ever bit an opponent. So be it. The Fenway Group had to do something since the club was suffering a massive public relations nightmare, plus they're probably stuck with Suarez because unless Marge Schott comes back from the grave to own a soccer team if they tried to sell him they'd take a massive financial loss, or what's know around Anfield these days as a "Downing."

(*) Again, imagine as an example if a member of the Red Sox used a ethnic slur against a Yankee and it got out. ESPN might implode on itself.

It's more discouraging that two men can't shake hands is a gigantic story. In a sense, writing even in this small slice of the blogosphere, makes the issue worse since it's helping to perpetuate it. I acknowledge my fault in this.

Then again, do we really want to talk about Liverpool's walking dead performance in the second half, prior to Suarez's late goal from a Terry-approved bad bounce off Rio Ferdinand in the closing minutes? Wouldn't it make more sense to praise the return to full fitness from Manchester United wide midfielder Antonio Valencia, who seems to have injected a newfound verve into the squad? Or that Jonny Evans played a very solid, error-free match? Or a fantastic match from Wayne Rooney with two classy finishes?

Nah, it's 2012.

Let's just talk, post and tweet about whatever will get the most eyeballs and pageviews, however untoward it might be. Hell, if Chris Brown can be feted by the RIAA with Grammys and a pair of performances on live television to all of America what chance does civility and dignity have going forward?

Singing and Praising the Blues:

So that'll be that on Landon Donovan Mach 2.0 at Everton. Overall the record with Donovan in the lineup for the Toffees was only two wins, three draws and two losses in Premier League action (two FA Cup wins, though), however the two wins he played a role in came against Manchester City and Chelsea. Even if the ceiling of Everton this year is a last-gasp run at a Europa League place, the club is certainly better off with Donovan and its a shame he couldn't finish out the year with the club, instead of coming back for those all-important MLS regular season games in March, April and May. (Hey, when do the Galaxy play Chivas USA, that's almost as good as the Merseyside Derby, right?)

As much as a personal loss it is for Donovan, David Moyes and Everton are in the tougher spot since Donovan was basically a ball-tease. Everton got used to his smart passing and high-energy play for two months, then he departs back to SoCal.

Saturday at Goodison Park, Chelsea were the team that could have used a little injection of life as they sleepwalked to a 2-0 loss. The Blues are still in place for a Champions League spot, but now behind Arsenal for fourth place on goal difference. Chelsea's woes are well documented, so no sense rehashing them.

Chelsea do at least since have Napoli coming up next week in the Champions League, but if Andre Villas-Boas team gets knocked out it'll again be Armageddon at Stamford Bridge -- and probably daily stories of a Roman Abramovich/Jose Mourinho reunion.


Ugh.


Hail Harry:


Oh the beauties of modern life. Tottenham put forth its best display of the season, throttling Newcastle United 5-0 at White Hart Lane behind the two-pronged attack of Emmanuel Adebayor and Louis Saha ... only for my Fox Soccer cable feed to become pixelated beyond the point of watching it. What are the odds that of the 500 channels I get, one of the seven I actually watch shits the bed during the small window when said channel actually has stuff on it worth watching? Really, you couldn't knock out CSPAN or CNN or Oprah's channel?

Tottenham is a club that tends to look toward the doom-and-gloom, but Spurs are seven points off first compared to a 10-point gap over Arsenal and Chelsea for fourth and fifth.

Oh and there's a little thing called the North London Derby pending at the Emirates when Premier League play resumes on Feb. 26.

Oh, Henry:

In the end, Thierry Henry's return to Arsenal wasn't much more than a nostalgia trip, but hey, I'm as guilty as anyone in loving nostalgia. Hell, the whole season, with Paul Scholes back in the mix is one big trip down memory road.

Maybe that's selling the return of TH14/12 a little short. He did bag a late winner for Arsenal vs. Leeds in the FA Cup. His goal Saturday -- perhaps one of his most graceless ever -- got the Gunners three massive points vs. Sunderland on the road, pushing them back into fourth.

The story isn't completely written, either, since he could feature vs. AC Milan in the Champions League (reminder, write down the name Stephan El-Shaarawy).

Around the League:

Wolves finally sacked Mick McCarthy after its 5-1 loss at home to rival West Brom. Atrocious result, but the club thinking it'll find some retread manager on the scrap heap who will be able to save them from relegation is silly logic. ... Manchester City stayed in first with a 1-0 win at uninspired Aston Villa, which loses Richard Dunne for two months. Maybe a good thing. ... Fulham beat Stoke City and got a debut goal from Pavel Pogrebnyak. Russians, for whatever the reason, have a terrible track record in England. ... Second worst result of the weekend was Bolton losing 2-1 at home to last place Wigan. Poor Tim Ream. ... Blackburn Rovers beat QPR 3-2, this sets up a pretty clear relegation five-team race with Blackburn, QPR, Wolves, Bolton and Wigan. Aston Villa, yes, are the club above that group, although seven points clear.

Fantasy Team O' the Week:

Longtime reader Drew Konig's "Will This Do?" put up 72 points this week with big hitters Adebayor, Rooney and Aaron Ramsey coming through.

Own Goal of the Week:

Sure, it went of Tomas Sorensen and ruled as an own-goal, still, hell of a strike by Clint Dempsey.




One Other Thing:

Can't say enough good things about the Copper Bullets triumph in Libreville, Gabon yesterday -- the site of the national team's fatal plane crash at sea in 1993. It's such a good story I won't even point out the penalty misses by Didier Drogba in regular time or Gervinho's cowardice in the shoot out.






Video of the Week:

So, it turns out the Illuminati's infiltrated of the rap game isn't just a great running joke by @FanSince09 on Twitter ...

Labels: EPL, Liverpool, luis suarez, manchester United, patrice evra, Soccer

... remember: firm and manly ... firm AND manly.

If you've read me in any form of media over the years, you'll know I have no extra love saved up for ESPN aside from my unofficial English uncle, Ian Darke -- the most earnest man in sports media.

No sense rehashing what makes ESPN insufferable, although it could be argued its a byproduct of the 24/7 news cycle. That doesn't absolve them from chummy relations with athletes, inane panels and argument shows or the continued employment of Dick Vitale.

ESPN, however, seems like a lesser evil to the way sports are spun and consumed in England where it's unabashedly tabloid 99 percent of the time.

It's always something. There's always some unsavory talking point coming into or out of a match. This year it seems the co-headliners of allegedly racist players and horrid officiating have gone hand-in-hand. It's a small mercy we haven't had to deal with any of this on the Worldwide Leader in Sports.

If you follow English soccer you almost can't avoid it.

During the week we saw the national team manager Fabio Capello resigned from his post because the FA decided John Terry -- facing an actual hearing in court for what he may or may not have said to Anton Ferdinand weeks ago -- was unfit to be the Three Lions captain anymore.

Saturday it will be impossible to avoid the tired Luis Suarez v. Patrice Evra scandal when Liverpool and Manchester United meet at Old Trafford.

Wait what's that music ....





"The Hater's Guide to Euro 2012." 



Saturday:

* Manchester United v. Liverpool -- (Live, ESPN2, 7:30 a.m.) --If you're United you can probably write off losing to Liverpool in the FA Cup two weeks ago. The diehard Mancs who make it their mission in life to hate Scousers and vice versa, probably won't be as forgiving. Reminds me, doubt Karl Pilkington cares too much about the Prem, though it's worth watching this clip to its completion either way for a nice payoff.




Joking aside, United really don't have much time for excuses any more if it hopes to chase down Manchester City. Coming back from 3-0 down to Chelsea was impressive -- but it was still two dropped points. You know, since this is a high-level game in England, the referee's whistle is almost as important as the two starting XIs, but United can't rely on getting goals from the penalty spot. It's about now where a fully fit Javier Hernandez would be a huge boost to the Red Devils, who's defense will always be an issue so long as Jonny Evans and the rapidly zombifying body of Rio Ferdinand remains in the mix.

Liverpool? When is it ever simple with Kenny Dalglish's men? What are the odds, 100-to-1 that Suarez gets through this match without doing something crazy? By that token, what are the odds Dirk Kuyt doesn't find a way to score in this one?

The college football rivalry between Georgie and Georgia Tech goes by the moniker, "Clean, Old-Fashioned Hate" ... get rid of the clean part and you have this match. ... Manchester United 2, Liverpool 0

* Fulham v. Stoke City -- Panic isn't the right word for it, but I'd be worried if I was a Fulham fan. Clint Dempsey is hotter than a supernova, yet the team all season hasn't cracked the top half of the table. Martin Jol has brought in some new players (Bryan Ruiz, John Arne Riise, the immortal Orlanda Sa) yet the team is still reliant on old Roy Hodgson guard players. Another concern, Fulham has six league wins -- four when the team started a 4-4-2 lineup, three of which included Bobby Zamora. If an "established" team gets sucked into the relegation muck, it could be the Whites. That said, Stoke City despite its fine form in the FA Cup and Europa League has been painfully average in the Prem, with its 23 goals second worst to Wigan. ... Fulham 2, Stoke City 0

* Sunderland v. Arsenal -- (Live, FSC+, 10 a.m.) Clearly a litmus test, here, for Sunderland and its revival under Martin O'Neill, though a win over Manchester City last month probably already provided some validation. Stephane Sessagnon, perhaps Steve Bruce's farewell gift to the Black Cats, has been as good as anyone in the Premier League in 2012 with three goals in a roving attack role. It's the play, though of relative unknowns James McLean, Jack Colback and David Meyler -- each 22 years old -- that should be noted. Plus a healthy Phil Bardsley teamed with Seb Larsson give Sunderland a very solid right side of the field. As always, nearly impossible to gauge Arsenal. Robin van Persie is the given in the middle of an attacking trio, but we still never know which Theo Walcott turns up from week-to-week and while Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain is as exciting a player as we've seen for his stocky blend of pace and power, he's still too green to get a read on. All-and-all, very excited for this match. ... Sunderland 1, Arsenal 1

* Swansea City v. Norwich City -- Don't know what this says about me as a person, but when I wrote down this match it made my mind drift to Denise Richards and Neve Campbell making out in that movie "Wild Things." ... Swansea City 2, Norwich City 0

* Blackburn Rovers v. QPR -- This looks like a RELEGATION SIX POINTER (tm) where defense should be all but optional. Don't forget, Yakubu is back after a three-match ban for a red card. Makes the game a little more interesting. ... Blackburn 3, QPR 1

* Bolton v. Wigan Athletic -- No stretch here, if Bolton entertain any hopes of avoiding the drop -- which at this point the club deserves -- it has to take three points there. ... Bolton 1, Wigan 0

* Everton v. Chelsea -- (Live, FSC, 10 a.m.) Troubling sign for Everton? It's February and Tim Howard and Tim Cahill have the same amount of goals. Here's an interesting stat for Everton, since the start of 2012 (actually all the way to Oct. 23) there haven't been more than three total goals scored in games involving the Toffees. Call it the Moyes margin for error. Chelsea are still going to miss Ramires' presence in the middle of the field. And on the plus side the team isn't as out-and-out detestable with Gary Cahill deputizing for Terry and Juan Mata and Daniel Sturridge are fun to watch playing together. Interesting debate, too, via Bobby McMahon, who would you rather have: David Silva or Mata? ... Everton 1, Chelsea 1

* Tottenham v. Newcastle United -- (Live, FSC, 12:30 p.m.) All hail Arry Redknapp! As a semi/sorta Spurs fan, Redknapp for England would probably be a great thing. He's assembled a very nice squad, though kudos do go to Martin Jol and even Juande Ramos. If Tottenham replaced Redknapp with a slightly more progressive manager, imagine what could happen with all the talent at his disposal? And if said manager turned out to be Jose Mourinho my head may explode. If it was Rafa Benitez, well, I'd probably have to reconsider a lot of my core beliefs. That's something to worry about later.

Who'd have thought this would be a game with massive Champions League implications in August?

This one probably boils down to which set of center backs play better. Can Fab Coloccini and Michael Williamson cope with the speed of Spurs attacking players, meanwhile any chance Michael Dawson and Ledley King are imposing vs. Demba Ba and Papiss Cisse as they were vs. Liverpool on Monday? James Perch and Danny Guthrie, though, may not be a match for the Gentleman Scott Parker, Jake Livermore and Luka Modric. ... Spurs 3, Newcastle 1

Sunday:

* Wolves v. West Bromwich Albion -- (Live, FSC+, 8:30 a.m.) Rivalry match with, as always, the reek of desperation for both teams. Maybe its the mustard uniforms but Wolves are the least telegenic team in the Premier League. West Brom aren't much better. This is for the hardest of the hardcore. Preferably if you have tattoo of either club's initial on the inside of your lip. ... Wolves 2, West Brom 1


* Aston Villa v. Manchester City -- (Live, FSC, 11 a.m.) Aston Villa fans may protest Alex McLeish before the match. Never understand what the point of these are, yet Villians should expect a little more than a decidedly medicore-to-underwhelming team. In Darren Bent you have a guy who could start for England at the Euros and a solid mix of young and old across the field, but the team is just so very blah. You could argue, even if all the top Villa players were in form, what's the peak here? Sixth place? Since Christmas Manchester City have been very ordinary and ripe for the plucking, but Villa don't seem to have the gusto to do so, maybe Richard Dunne two years ago had the fire in his belly to damage his former club, but now? I'll take Kun Aguero in that fight, if only for a split-second moment of brilliance. ... Aston Villa 1, Manchester City 2.

Last round: 5-5
Season: 113-130

Labels: EPL, EPL picks, hater's guide to euro 2012, Soccer

x

Cech yo self.

This will all, probably, make sense by the time its over. Maybe.

A quick confession, first. Your humble (and ruggedly handsome) author of this little blog-o-rama doesn't read all that much about sports these days. On the surface, how does that make sense? You basically can't click anywhere on the Internet without sports opinion -- or slideshows -- smashing you in the face.

At the same time, as evidenced by the two weeks of hoopla spent hyping up the Super Bowl, after a while you run out of things to say -- unless it's a second quarter dunk in a regular season NBA game, then we can all talk about it for days since its that important. . It all ends a big pile of dross, in one ear out the other. Desperately important, yet instantly forgettable.

My novel, stress novel, approach to sports the last couple years is ... are you sitting down? Watching the games themselves and then forming my own opinions. Crazy, right? Sure I never suited up in the NFL or have ever been to England to even watch a Premier League match in person, yet in the world we live in, the role of analysts is marginalized. Granted there's a lot of screaming and bickering on all forms of social media, which can end up nothing more than a virtual shouting match on the schoolyard playground -- or making fun of Madonna's halftime performance. Either or.

Still, as you guys all probably know, there's nothing quite like watching a big sporting event with everybody chiming in instantly on Twitter, which is usually a meritocracy ... unless you're a famous comedian when everything you write gets mindlessly retweeted. Maybe it's not the best way to form opinions because of the knee-jerk, instantaneously aspect. Still it's a lot more satifisying in a world where a "common" man's opinion can be just as valid -- or wrong -- as some ex-jock in a suit on ESPN spouting the same cliches we've all heard a thousand times.

Or you can be Piers Morgan and somehow parlay your tiresome, self-promoting act into hosting various gigs on American television -- including FOX's Premier League coverage.

But I digress.

That rambling preamble was, in a way, supposed to justify why I have very little to offer or add to Manchester United's famous 3-3 comeback draw against Chelsea at Stamford Bridge. If you watched the game, you saw it.

Do we need to regurgitate the John Terry is the world's biggest piece of shit/has the world's worst haircut angle, again? (Wayne Rooney attempting the 'thick' mohawk look might put even Terry's Supercuts inspired look to shame.)

If anything, this again reiterated the Charles Bronson-like steely determination exhibited by Manchester United. If City is going to wrest the title from them, it'll be after a 20-minute 357 Magum shootout and or whip fight. Love or hate United, coming back from 3-0 down on the road is damn impressive, granted the whistles of Howard Webb had a lot to do with it. Wait, a big showcase game in soccer tinged by the decisions of a referee? I never.

Grinding out a draw leaves United only two points off Manchester City for first, so in theory the Red Devils still control their own destiny since a win vs. City would push them in front, should the two keep the pace with each other until their game in April.

It's coincidental, isn't it, how Arsenal's comeback in the second half vs. Aston Villa was aided by penalties, including one set up by Darren Bent -- a striker -- taking down Laurent Koscielny -- a defender. Sunday at Stamford Bridge it was Daniel Sturridge -- one, if not the only, Chelsea guy I don't dislike -- pushing over Patrice Evra.

Conspiracy theorists are going to go gaga over United scoring four consecutive goals from the penalty spot, I get that. At the same time, no evil and nefarious force controlled by Sir Alex Ferguson was keeping Gary Cahill or David Luiz(*) from marking Chicharito on the game-tying goal, was there?


(*) I'm starting a dance move called "The Luiz." It involves running into the nearest person, trying to juke them and then falling over. In practice, not much different than my personal dance moves already.

These games, from a media standpoint, you have to frame as did United comeback or Chelsea blow it? Probably some of both, though that's certainly an atrocious job by the Blues. It's easy to say if Chelsea had Terry, Frank Lampard and Ashley Cole that "veteran" leadership would have seen them through, although they probably missed Ramires in the middle of the field more than anything.

Or you could blame Fail-nando Torres for taking an extra touch and not getting a fourth goal for the Blues.

From one maligned Spaniard, to another, it was a bit of a day of redemption for David De Gea. Sure he let in three goals -- including a thump by Juan 'M83' Mata -- but his full-extension save in stoppage time to deny his countryman from a free kick was probably the save of the season.

All-in-all, one hell of an entertaining game.

But you already knew that, didn't you?

Horrible Morning:

I often question my sanity. Often. Never more than getting up after a night of drinking on four hours sleep on a Saturday to watch the Premier League early kickoff on ESPN2. The irony, at the bar I actually had a conversation with a friend about Albert Einstein's definition of insanity being doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

Regardless, usually "Sir" Ian Darke and Steve McManaman are the perfect cure for the Miller Lite, err, some fancy craft beer blues, but Macca was absence since his wife gave birth. That mean waking up, with Arsenal already up 1-0 on Blackburn and me staring at my bedroom ceiling hating life in general ... which is pretty much a standard morning, but whatever.

Arsenal did give up an equalizer on a sick free kick by Morten Gamst Pedersen, but it didn't matter. Robin van Persie notched another hat trick and the game ended 7-1, snapping the Gunners four-game league winless streak. Newsflash, that van Persie fellow is pretty good.

Of note here, Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain seems poised to enter the English media hype cycle. Are the journos fighting each other with knives over who can pen the first AOC for Euro 2012 article? Or have those already been written? 

Something tells me, should Blackburn, Wigan, Wolves or Bolton get relegated, few will mourn their depature.

Ice Station Impossible:

Soccer needs more games in the snow. Even if it was (red-hot) Sunderland at Stoke City, it was absolutely glorious to watch. Less so for Manchester City's boring 3-0 win over Fulham later in the day.

Have to admit it's a bummer Clint Dempsey didn't score at the Etihad and celebrated with a snow angel. 


It's Real:

Newcastle United are now the smartest run team in England. The only rational explanation for this is that future Mike Ashley found a discarded sports almanac in the trash and used a souped up Delorean to give it to his current-day self.

Even with Chelsea's result, the Mapgies are only a point off fourth place. With 24 out of 38 matches played, it can no longer be called a fluke.

Sunday Newcastle handled Aston Villa without Yoann Cabaye and Chiek Tiote in the midfield, with Danny Guthrie picking up the slack. The all-Senegal strikeforce scored with Demba Ba and Papiss Cisse -- with an absolute cracker -- returning from aplomb from the African Cup of Nations.

We've all expected Alan Pardew's club to backslide, yet as we speak this morning both Arsenal and Liverpool need to leapfrog the Magpies if they want a slice of that Champions League C.R.E.A.M.

Around the League:

Poor Tim Howard, a bad deflection and ensuing English caused him to let in a howler vs. Wigan. Wigan couldn't hold on and drew 1-1, condemning Roberto Martinez's team to the foot of the table. ... Wolves got three massive points, coming back from 1-0 to win at QPR in a match that saw Djibril Cisse sent off for trying to put Roger Johnson in the Million Dollar Dream. ... Norwich City and Swansea City are now 9th and 10th in the table and seem safe enough with so many other crummy teams below them. Personally, just happy to have Gyfli Sigurdsson in the mix again. ...

Fantasy Team O' the week:

Big scoring week, especially if you got 46 points for captaining van Persie. Top marks go to Brendan McGuire's 'Shooting for Row Z' with 95 points, mainly to RvP, Kun Aguero and a savvy 11 points from Sunderland's in-form winger James McLean.

One Other Thing:

English soccer players truly had me in stiches during the Super Bowl for stuff like this ...

What a bad start Patriots....fouls galore....
— Rio Ferdinand (@rioferdy5) February 5, 2012

Then again, considering I broke my own pledge not to use Twitter late night after drinking on Friday/Saturday maybe I shouldn't be having a laugh at Rio.If you happened to see those -- frankly -- pathetic dispatches, my apologies.

If not, pretend you never read that last paragraph.

Enjoy Liverpool/Spurs.

Labels: Arsenal, EPL, fox soccer, manchester United, monday posts, robin van persie, Wayne Rooney

It was all just an excuse to see R.R. Drenthe's hair up close, I swear to ya!

January transfer madness came and went in England and it was ... as mild as a game of "Marble Madness." (insert groan here.)

Unless you're a person who spends 99 percent of his waking hours playing "Football Manager," it's tough to get revved up for David Pizzaro moving on loan from Roma to Manchester City. Sure, we've all twisted and turned in our beds, unable to sleep trying to decide if the Chilean is better as a deep-lying holding player or tucked in behind the strikers, yet it's not all that juicy, nothing more than an amuse-bouche to whet the appetite.

Sadly, for us in the "business" of making pithy and instantly forgettable quips about people from the anonymity of a keyboard, Premier League clubs realized that shelling out big money on flashy signings in the middle of the season -- sometimes on an hour's notice -- might not actually be the best way to run a club.

Alas.

Of the 20 clubs in the Premier League, only two really did drastic re-designs on deadline day: QPR and Everton. QPR, was expected, since Mark Hughes was given money to keep the team in the Premier League, while Everton's was a mild surprise since David Moyes is always crying poverty.

QPR gambled on Djibril Cisse still being a viable player at the Premier League level. He did score on his debut Tuesday, for what that's worth. Cisse, if healthy, will score some goals and do little else. However you slice it, he's an upgrade over Jay Boothroyd.

Less convincing is the long pursuit of Bobby Zamora from Fulham. Why go for broke on a player making 90,000 pounds a week who's best goal return was eight in 27 matches at Fulham two years ago?

The potential Zamora-Cisse front line is decidedly more Premier League-level than what QPR had previously, though it casts aside whatever cohesion the team had in winning the Championship last season under Neil Warnock. (Not that those players/tactics were working this season in the top flight.)

QPR looks more Premier League with Zamora, Cisse, Nedum Onuoha and Taye Taiwo on-loan from Milan, but what happens to these highly-paid players should the club be relegated? And it's not like the club sorted out the on-going problems with Adel Taarabt. Suppose Hoops fans better hope his relationship with Hughes is more of the Craig Bellamy sort than the Robinho.

All that said, just three points above the drop, QPR needed to do something and they did.

Everton, after years of losing players, finally made a couple moves meaning David Moyes must have signed over one of his kidneys to a Russian Oligarch to fund it. Fortunately Landon Donovan is a nice guy and only requested a case of Crabbie's Ginger Beer from Moyes to play on loan at Goodison Park for a couple weeks.

Laugh at the Darron Gibson signing, but he's still only 24 and is a decent enough player to provide the club a little depth. Have him hang around Leon Osman at all times and maybe Everton secretly got themselves a little value.


Nikica Jelavić from Rangers is a dangerous move since whenever Moyes opens up the wallet, it tends to backfire. See the Russian winger who's name best be left unremembered. Again it's not rocket science, if Jelavic provides a consistent threat of goal up front, it's a good move, if not it's another waste of money. When you're Everton, you can't afford for it to be the latter.

And oh Stephen Pienaar.

Let it be said, the grass isn't always greener.

Mini Pages:

It's February and the puzzles of the Premier League picture are crystal clear in the forms of "mini leagues."

At the top it's Manchester City and Manchester United level on points. One will end up with the title.

Below that is where the fun is, with Spurs (relatively safe in third), Chelsea, Newcastle United (haven't faded, have to count them), Liverpool and Arsenal all fighting for those last two Champions League places. We could easily see two of the old "Big Four" on the outside looking in next season, a far cry from the days of Liverpool, Chelsea and Manchester United comprising three of the final four teams in the Champions League a few years ago.

If Arsenal or Chelsea fall out of the top four, seismic changes could be on the way.

A little further down, let's lump the group of Sunderland, Stoke, Everton and probably Aston Villa as teams that basically have nothing left to play for. Barring calamity or a dry spell of Steve Carrell proportions, they're not getting relegated.

Norwich City, Swansea City, Fulham and West Brom are probably solid enough that they won't be sweating out every 90 minutes in March, April and May, but they're not good enough either to afford to ease up.

So that leaves the relegation derby between QPR, Bolton, Blackburn, Wolves and Wigan. If any of these five emerge as a "dead" team and an automatic three points, where they simply roll over it might be Wolves, who've shown nothing for weeks ... aside from taking a point at White Hart Lane.

Blackburn, you'd think, already would have quit on Steve Kean, but they haven't, although it appears Chris Samba has. Wigan is still Wigan. Write them off at your own peril.

Bolton isn't very dynamic -- or good -- so expect Owen Coyle to be sweating through his short-shorts the rest of the way.

Fun.


Saturday:

* Arsenal v. Blackburn Rovers -- (Live, ESPN2, 8 a.m.) Arsenal's ills are easy to diagnose, if strange. The team can't score goals. Since defeating Wigan 4-0 on Dec. 3, the Gunners have scored more than once in a league game only twice. After Robin van Persie's league-leading 19 goals, the next Arsenal player is Gervinho with four. This is where the losses of Cesc Fabregas and Samir Nasri are killing the team. Although Wenger replaced them, nominally with Mikel Arteta and increased playing time for Aaron Ramsey, the knack for goal eludes them. Double that for Theo Walcott. Wenger better sort it out, since the Gunners' season will be defined in late February and early March with the two-leg AC Milan Champions League tie sandwiched around a home game with Spurs and a trip to Anfield. ... Arsenal 2, Blackburn 1

* Wigan Athletic v. Everton -- (Live, FSC, 10 a.m.) Here's Wigan in a nutshell, haven't won a game since Dec. 10, but if they find a way to ever win two in a row, the Latics are out of the relegation zone. Problem for Roberto Martinez, the team can't stop leaking goals. Everton have the league's worst offense, aside from Wigan in terms of goals scored. Wonder what happens without Landon Donovan, who seems to set up everything for the Toffees as of late. ... Wigan 1, Everton 1

* Norwich v. Bolton --Good example, here, of why chemistry on the field counts more for soccer than most sports. Norwich's collective roster had a tablespoon of combined top flight experience coming into the year, while Bolton's lineup though forgettable was filled with "proven" Premier League players -- and David Ngog. Norwich is nine points better than the Trotters this year. Shouldn't be so surprising, yet it is. Bolton haven't lost in four games (all competitions). If Owen Coyle could get his team to turn some of their division-high 15 losses into draws -- Bolton only has two -- and this club would be a lot better off. ... Norwich City 2, Bolton 1

* QPR v. Wolves -- Running theme here, Wolves haven't won since Dec. 4. It gets headlines when owner Steve Morgon storms into the locker room to dress down the team, but what does he expect? This club is decidedly average in all spots. Counting on Sebastien Bassong and Emmanuel Frimpong to come in on loan and save the season is a bit much, too. ... QPR 2, Wolves 0

* Stoke City v. Sunderland -- (Live, FSC+, 10 a.m.) Martin O'Neill was rolling seven after seven at the Sunderland craps table and then ... brings in Wayne Bridge. Oy. Joking aside, nice to see Frazier Campbell back in the fray for Sunderland. The kid had an abundance of talent, prior to blowing out his knee twice. Read somewhere, too, he used to attend matches in a hoodie and stand with the Sunderland supporters. Wish there were more stories about stuff like that instead of Mario Balotelli tall tales. ... Stoke City 1, Sunderland 1

* West Brom v. Swansea City -- Call it the Hodgson effect, but West Brom are the most "meh" team in the Premier League. Nothing flashy. Nothing that jumps out at you. They show up. Play 90 minutes. We move on with our lives. ... West Brom 1, Swansea City 1

* Manchester City v. Fulham -- (Live, FSC, 12:30 p.m.) Thinking ahead here, but if Clint Dempsey scores in this match it's among his most important at the club. Not quite scoring vs. Liverpool in his debut season to keep Fulham in the Prem, or the chip of ages vs. Juventus, but it would directly impact the title race. ... City 2, Fulham 0

Sunday:


* Newcastle United v. Aston Villa -- (Live, FSC, 8 a.m.) Is the fact Newcastle United is 11-6-6 in the Premier League in February, sitting in fifth place an endorsment for the strides the league has made for being more competitive? Or the indication of a water-down, weaker league in general? ... Newcastle United 1, Aston Villa 2


* Chelsea v. Manchester United -- (Live, FOX ... unless you live in North Carolina, 11 a.m.) I tweeted this a while ago, but thank god ESPN's talking heads don't know who John Terry is, so let's just move on since I get way too many warm and fuzzy thoughts thinking about the American public "meeting" the English Lion himself on national television. Schools are going to be filled with children Monday morning featuring haircuts that will get them sent to detention since the teachers will think they did it themselves with a pair of clippers in the bathroom between periods.

People of England should probably be grateful Terry is standing trial for his alleged racial slurs on Anton Ferdinand. It stripped him of the England captaincy meaning he's no longer guaranteed to start for England, which is a good thing since he's not the player he once was. If Fabio Capello had any guts, he'd leave him home for the Euro, good karma like that can only be beneficial in the long run, right?

Sticking with the national thoughts, is there a player in American sports we all revel in his personal failures with such delights at Fernando Torres? Tony Romo? LeBron James? A-Rod? That's good -- and bad -- company to be associated with.

Have a feeling here that Sir Alex won't care about entertaining the American audience when he fields his lineup, instead picking a conservative team, where a glum draw wouldn't be the end of the world. Not sure with the team so beat up, the Red Devils can gear it up here and put Chelsea to the sword.

Then again, all it takes is a moment of sloppiness from David Luiz for United to keep the knife right at City's throat.

The one shame here is that there isn't a betting line on this for an England international breaking a metatarsal during the 90 minutes. ... Chelsea 1, Manchester United 1


Monday:

* Liverpool v. Tottenham -- (Live, ESPN2, 3 p.m.) Willingly have chosen to ignore Harry Redknapp's tax trial, because honestly I might enjoy English soccer but I could give a damn about English tax torts. Plus, it's always uncomfortable, speaking from experience, to see a grown man cry.

It's funny again how things work out. Liverpool spent all that money on new players in 2012 and the best signing was Craig Bellamy on a free transfer. Couple that with the rapid return to form from Steven Gerrard and it's like the 2005 FA Cup Final all over again.

The way the table has shaken out, this is a much bigger game for Liverpool trying to grab fourth place than it is for Spurs, who can really cement a place in the Champions League with a point here and win next week vs. Newcastle United. Liverpool are going to miss Lucas (as usual) in chasing around Luka Modric, it should be fun to see Glen Johnson "marking" Gareth Bale. Maybe Kenny Dalglish has something in his bag of tricks, figure he'll try something out of the ordinary to get Tottenham on the back foot. ... Liverpool 2, Spurs 1

Last round: 4-6
Season: 108-125

Labels: EPL, EPL picks, Soccer

... but he still makes millions and has won both the Euro and World Cup. (Dammit!)

Strange dealing, no, in England with the Premier League in full swing in the midweek as the January transfer window comes closing down.

We'll explore it more on Friday when I have a little more time to blog the night away. Right now I think I must still be asleep since Everton, hope you're sitting down, actually signed an actual player in the form of Nikica Jelevic from Rangers. If I'm not a asleep, I'm upset to see Vedran Corluka depart Tottenham for Leverkausen. (Sad face.)

For now a couple quick picks. Hope you have access to ESPN3 ... or other less legal options. I'm on a mini-one day vacation, so I'm out of the mix. Keep me entertained on Twitter.


Tuesday:

* Swansea City v. Chelsea -- (Live, ESPN3, 2:45 p.m.) So long as Swansea can stay in the Premier League there's a chance -- in the next year or two -- the Swans could take on Chelsea's latest signing -- baby-faced 20-year-old Belgian midfielder Kevin de Bruyne -- on loan. Chelsea in-house youth product Josh McEachran can't even get a game at Stamford Bridge, so he's now at loan at Swansea. Are Chelsea fans upset, too, that Scott Sinclair never got much run in London, ending up as the talisman at Swansea? Until Chelsea do a full clear-out, doesn't seem like the young players are ever going to get a chance there. ... Swansea 1, Chelsea 1

* Tottenham v. Wigan -- (Live, ESPN3, 2:45 p.m.) Spurs were awful against Watford in the FA Cup, but won 1-0. That would do just fine against a life-support Wigan team. Surprised QPR would want to try to sign Wigan's Hugo Rolledega, considering he's not exactly a consistent player. Sure he makes a big play and stands out since he has a knack for the spectacular, but otherwise he's not much better than what the club already has. Of course, if you're Wigan and facing relegation, might as well sell parts while the value is high? ... Tottenham 3, Wigan 1

* Wolves v. Liverpool -- (Live, FSC+, 2:45 p.m.) Banana peels are yellow. Wolves home kit is orange. Be forewarned, Liverpool. Potentially tricky games like this is why you can't have nice things. Steven Gerrard looking great, though. ... Wolves 1, Liverpool 1


* Manchester United v. Stoke City -- (Live, ESPN2, 3 p.m.) United off a loss? That never bodes well, but the Red Devils defense is like that dude's face after encountering "Epic Beard Man" -- leaking. Tony Pulis probably sits home late at night playing "FIFA: Ultimate Team." He's not that creative, however, and basically throws out his current Stoke team but mixes in a Paul Scholes "card" from 2007. ... Manchester United 2, Stoke City 1

* Everton v. Manchester City -- (Live, FSC, 3 p.m.) Brother, can you spare two dimes. Alternately, there's an outside chance we get Bootleg Tevez vs. Real Tevez here. A man an dream. ... Everton 0, Man City 2


Wednesday:


* Aston Villa v. QPR -- Hard to see a soccer team in England posting as epic a collapse as Villa in the second half vs. Arsenal in the FA Cup. Then again, when you have goons like Alan Hutton, Stephen Ireland and Richard Dunne in the mix, hard to feel that much sympathy. Don't want to write anything about QPR since it figures to be out of date in a few hours ... which of course leads to the widely unpredictable Dijbril Cisse. I like Cisse and he's not exactly ancient at only 30 years old, still despite his success in Greece topping the scoring charts for two years after leaving Sunderland he was a massive dud at Lazio lasting less than a season and scoring only once in Italy. Glad to have him back in the mix, however if only to Mario Balotelli a run for insane haircuts. ... Aston Villa 1, QPR 0

* Fulham v. West Bromwich Albion -- (Live, FSC+, 3 p.m.) Honestly, a 90 minute conversation between Martin Jol and Roy Hodgson and their wonderful accents might be more entertaining that this match. ... Fulham 1, West Brom 0

* Blackburn Rovers v. Newcastle United -- (Live, ESPN3, 3 p.m.) Guess Ronaldinho probably isn't coming to Blackburn. Love the personal protest by Christopher Samba against Venky's. Where else but soccer, maybe the NBA, could a player pout and proclaim he won't play ... when, after all, the club plucked him out of obscurity from Hertha Berlin a few years ago and made him rich. ... Blackburn 1, Newcastle 1

* Bolton v. Arsenal -- (Live, FSC, 3 p.m.) All aboard the Arsenal express. Next stop Bolton! Methinks the Gunners build up a bit of goodwill and let it all come crashing down in the Champions League in a few weeks. ... Bolton 1, Arsenal 2

* Sunderland v. Norwich City -- (Live, ESPN3, 3 p.m.) Of course Martin O'Neill would want to sign Kevin Davies from Bolton. Not the worst idea in the world with a guy with service like Seb Larsson. ... Sunderland 2, Norwich City 0


Last round: 4-6
Season: 104-119

Labels: English Premier League, EPL, EPL picks, Soccer

U.S. 1, Panama 0. 

First thing's first, there is a special ring of purgatory reserved for an American soccer blogger/writer with the temerity to poo-poo a result on foreign soil ... even in a no-stakes friendly. In that regard, let's say a hearty well done for Graham Zusi for being Johnny on the spot and scoring inside of 11 minutes and the rest of the U.S. players for holding off a semi-dangerous Panama team for about 30 minutes after Geoff Cameron's straight red card.

It gave Jurgen Klinsmann a solid 2-0-0 start to the 2012 campaign before next month's higher-profile friendly with the dastardly Italians in Genoa. If anything, it's better to see U.S. 1, Panama 0 for the next couple hours on the ESPN crawl, right?

At the same time, there was something, let's say retrogressive about Wednesday night's friendly, though not from a sporting standpoint. It simply felt, oh, like it was 1995 all over again.

During the afternoon on Wednesday American soccer fans were treated, first, to a taunt Liverpool second-leg Carling Cup semifinal victory over Manchester City on Fox Soccer, followed by the second-leg of the Copa del Rey quarterfinal between eternal blood rivals Real Madrid and Barcelona. Depending where you were those games were aired in crisp, sparkling HD with pulsating atmospheres at hallowed soccer grounds at Anfield and the Camp Nou, where the eyes -- and tweets -- of the world cast their gaze.

This isn't a U.S. can never be as good at soccer as it is in Europe argument, yet here it was a couple hours later and the U.S./Panama match wasn't available on cable in English, relegated to ESPN3 online and Galavasision's embarassingly awful Spanish broadcast in murky, standard definition.

Again, this is probably taking complaining on the Internet to another level, yet this felt like the days when my father and I would scramble and cross our fingers a U.S. game would -- if we were lucky -- air on Univision.

In short, everything felt a little second rate from what we've grown accustomed to, if in a totally spoiled first-world problem (ugh, buzzword) type of way.

However you frame it, the eyes of the world weren't exactly fixated on the Estadio Rommel Fernandez(*) for the U.S.'s 1-0 win over host Panama.  

(*) Wonder if David Lee Roth and or Van Halen have ever performed a concert there? (C'mon, you know I'm not writing anything about Panama without sneaking a Diamond Dave or Teddy Roosevelt reference, however forced.) 

Again, quality result for the U.S. "B/C" team. Did anyone on the field against Panama -- or Venezuela -- exactly distinguish himself for Herr Klinsmann going forward? Considering the German head coach still seems to rate Michael Orozco-Fiscal, it's thoroughly impossible to read between his ears.

Brek Shea, hellbent on a move to England apparently, is a lively player with a lot of drive and power wherever you stick him on the field. Nick Rimando, too, is solid as per usual in goal and should even at 32 remain in the mix as a second or third keeper.

The Bob Bradley-approved "Captain" Jermaine Jones and Ricardo Clark didn't do anything great or awful. Jones, for better or worse, appears right in the thick of Klinsmann's plans, even if the German-born midfielder's best chance to help the U.S. was probably in 2010 rather than 2014. If Jones reigns himself in, he's effective, but it all depends on what his role is: destroyer? disruptor? creator? shield? He launched some missiles from deep, but again drew a yellow card.

Clark? Glad he got a positive memory with the 97th minute winner vs. Venezuela, but if Kyle Beckerman didn't withdraw from the squad does he even see the field? Hard to see Clark vaulting past Beckerman or Michael Bradley or Maurice Edu or even Stuart Holden in the middle of the U.S. central midfield pecking order.

Moving on.

Tactically(*), with the U.S. playing a standard 4-4-2, until Cameron's sending off, the main focus of the attack seemed to come from the flanks. If this is going to be the main offensive strategy going forward, when the full U.S. team is called in it better be somebody like Shea serving crosses toward Clint Dempsey, not the other way around. If there's one thing Dempsey does -- obviously he does more -- but the Texan knows how to finish off movements in the box.

(*) These two matches weren't exactly the free-flowing, revoluntionary soccer Klinsmann hinted at in August, no?

Hard to say any of the U.S. forwards who saw the field did enough to declare themselves worthy of being called in for the Italy match -- which figures to be Euro-based player packed. Teal Bunbury has potential, but at what level? CONCACAF or a higher international? Chris Wondolowski is a nice MLS grinder and has the worst luck in a national team shirt, getting denied on an absolutely brilliant reaction save by Luis Mejia.

In typical U.S. two steps forward, one step back fashion Cameron shined against Venezuela only to get sent off for an arm bar on Blas Perez, who'd run behind the defense and had a clear 1-v-1 with Sean Johnson unless the Houston Dynamo man interceded. Did Perez let his feet go out from him rather easily? Sure. At the same time, in the state of the modern soccer game what is and isn't a red card anymore? Who knows. Cameron might have been better off stamping on Perez rather than leaning into his with his forearm.

Again, considering his track record it's probably fruitless to guess what Klinsmann gleaned from this month of practices and two friendlies. Aside from the Bundesliga Badboy, "Captain" Jermaine and Shea nobody else who featured is a sure-thing to play next month in Italy. Maybe a couple of the players, say, Zusi did enough to warrant a spot on a roster vs. a CONCACAF minnow to save guys like Dempsey or Landon Donovan a trip across the Atlantic. 

Like most USMNT January friendlies, the best approach is to take the Homer Simpson reaction to the family's ill-fated shortcut to Itchy & Scratchy Land. So, as he said, "Let us never speak of this again."

Labels: Friendlies, jurgen klinsmann, Soccer, USMNT

The Human Meme strikes ... again. Jerk.

Good grief Charlie Brown, where on earth to begin after that highest of high incident Premier League weekend? That was a five-course seven-course meal and not even a dash of Piers Morgan could ruin it.

Hell, where do we even start?

* Manchester City's 95th minute win over Spurs?
* Manchester United beating Arsenal, again?
* The coverage on FOX?
* Clint Dempsey's hat trick?
* The continuing Liverpool malaise?
* QPR's win over Wigan?

The Man, the Meme, the Legend:

Being right never felt this wrong. Shortly after Edin Dzeko was subbed off by Manchester City in the second for Mario Balotelli, my friend "Bones" texted me how lousy the Bosnian striker had been. My response? "Well Balotelli I destined to score the winner." (sic.)

Who, at about 8:50 a.m. Eastern, could have foreseen the exact road to that winner, however?

The irony here, is that City's 3-2 win -- the second half at least -- was about as good an advertisement for the EPL as possible. Great goals. Big personalities. Controversy. Drama. This was the kind of match all of America should have seen, even my non-soccer friend Greg got wrapped up in it.

Consider it the Balotelli Effect.

After what happened Sunday at the Eithad, it's a good bet we haven't seen the best (or worst) of Balotelli. However you slice it, he seems hell bent of doing the most insane, absoludircous act by a professional athlete ever.

Literally anything is in play. Stealing the Declaration of Independence? Sure, why not. Throwing his body into the Large Hadron Collider and turning into a Dr. Manhattan sort of character? I'll buy it.

All Balotelli did on Sunday was stomp The Gentleman Scott Parker -- twice -- directly in front of Howard Webb, no less, then draw a (deserved) penalty in the 95th minute via a Ledley King Ken Shamrock-scissor kick take-down, then covert said penalty -- in the rain -- to keep City atop the Premier League.

Why always him?

Because.

It could be said the stomping of The Gentleman was incidental, if you want.Was there malicious intent? Impossible to say. What's not is the maddening inconsistency of officiating in soccer across the globe. Balotelli might get his -- a multi game ban from the FA -- but he remained in the game and scored the winner.

Like I said, it's not a big game in English soccer without a huge dollop of hydrogenated controversy.

Weird game overall, too. City were never as ripe for the plucking as with Stefan Savic putting in a defensive performance that even had Titus Bramble and Jean-Allain Boumsong taking to Twitter to make jokes about it.

Still, City did manage a 2-0 lead, thanks to a slick pass by David Silva to tee up Samir Nasri and then just awful set piece defending by Spurs, allowing Jolean Lescott to let a ball bungle off to Klingon body and over the line. It's nothing we didn't already know, it's almost impossible to stop City from scoring goals -- especially at home, where they haven't lost since 2010 to (of all teams) Everton. City have only been held scoreless in two matches -- once on Boxing Day to West Brom -- and last week to Liverpool in the League Cup semifinals. 10 matches, 10 wins at home; 31 goals for; four against ... that's called getting the job done.(*)

What struck me in this game wasn't that Spurs rallied from 2-0 down to tie it, including a life-affirming, leper-curing strike by Gareth Bale, but the fact people were a) surprised Tottenham could do that and b) that the team is good. In soccer, more than any sport, there's this weird hegemony. It's almost as if the underdogs, or less perennial winners, are frowned on.

How many other team's in the world wouldn't want to field a midfield or Bale -- playing all over the field -- Luka Modric, The Gentleman and Aaron Lennon with Rafa van der Vaart playing right in front of it?

That said, maybe there's something to be said of the Tottenham history of being loveable, attract teams ... who just can't win the big one. Granted, my history of English football couldn't tell you much about the halycon days of 1961 with Dave Mackay and the double for Spurs, all I know is a team that can never -- bar rare occasions like the League Cup -- get it done, be it because of dodgy lasagna or some more nefarious, supernatural forces.

It's up to Spurs to forget about that history -- now 10 points up on Arsenal -- make sure they don't collapse and at least make the Champions League, if only to repeat scenes such as this one. Hey, if you don't win the league, trips to Bern and Milan are a nice consolation, in a "winner and loser" sense. At six points behind City and the two head-to-head encounters behind them. If Tottenham finishes six points behind City for the title, they'll know why, too. 

Long story short, this was the perfect advertisement for the what makes the Premier League so great.

(*) Side thought: overall the book "Scorecasting" was massively underwhelming. One decent point was the fact soccer teams win so often at home compared to other sports and how the referees decisions are impacted by it. Maybe at White Hart Lane it's a different decision. 

Same Old Story:

Honest question: Is it even worth re-hashing Manchester United's 2-1 win at the Emirates on Sunday?

Didn't everyone who's ever watched the Premier League, see that coming a mile -- nay, kilometer -- away?

Arsenal exposed for its lack of proper fullbacks? Check.

Arsenal teasing its fans with a glorious end-to-end goal, started by a Laurent Koscielny tackle inside his own box, a brilliant Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain pass and Robin van Persie, finish?

An apoplectic Arsene Wenger? Check.

An insane Wenger substitution? Check.

Now I know that there's an entire segment of the Internet writing community that make fun of columnists and other writers for determining that sports come down to things like "heart" or "mentality." Instead, everything can be proven via statistics or other metrics.

Arsenal's inability to beat Manchester United seems to boil down to, ahem, balls.

United lost Phil Jones inside of 20 minutes and had to slot Chris Smalling next to Jonny Evans and play Rafael at right back. Did the team crumple or give up? No. There's -- like it or not -- a commitment to winning that Sir Alex has instilled inside his team, up-and-down the squad. There's a lot of average and out-of-form players getting serious minutes for United at the moment, though the play of Antonio Valencia has provided a major spark. Old-and-creeky (Scholes, Giggs) or young-and-average (Evans), there's no whining in this team, so even ravaged by injuries all over the field (Chicharito, Vidic, Ferdinand, etc.) United never ease up.

Sir Alex is, in effect, Charlton Heston as NRA President. You'll have to wrest the title trophy from his cold dead hands. 

So even when Arsenal -- now losers of three straight -- knotted the game at 1-1, wasn't it obvious it was a matter of if, not when United would get the equalizer -- this time through Danny Welbeck?

Then again, gnashing our teeth and fretting about Arsenal seems silly. This team is patently average, slightly above average when van Persie is on his game. (The Dutchman may or may not have handed in a transfer request depending what you believe online.)

Go crazy, if you choose, about Wenger's (let's face it perplexing) decision to bring on Andrey Arshavin late in the game for the electric Oxlade-Chamberlain. Did you expect it to blow up in his face, with the enigmatic Russian getting toasted in the box on the game-winner? No, but it didn't make a ton of sense, though the Frenchman defended it through the fact the young English winger was tired and sick before the game.

It's not easy for Arsenal fans to come to gripes with this, but the dynamic has shifted. The glory days are, like, Theirry Henry -- part of the upper deck ringing the Emirates.

No Guts, (Faded) Glory?:

Somewhat of an interesting dynamic on display this weekend between two of the fading members of the old "Big Four" -- Arsenal and Liverpool.

Liverpool posted a shock 3-1 loss at Bolton, which afterward prompted Kenny Dalglish to wonder if the players care about what it means to play for Liverpool and if they took the Trotters for granted thinking they'd toss their jocks on the field and grab three points.

I've already underlined Arsenal's latest foibles.

Liverpool, with its American owners, want to embrace the "Moneyball" theories (not really, though) that helped make John Henry's Red Sox successful. In less than a year, the Fenway Group have only brought their free-spending Boston policies to Anfield, as it's looking a lot like Andy Carroll(*), Stewart Downing and Charlie Adam are that side of the Atlantic's versions of John Lackey, Carl Crawford and D-Kice.

(*) What were the odds, a year ago, that Newcastle United would be the big winners from the Carroll-Fernando mega-deal? 100-to-1?

Are the Liverpool trio already "flops" and unable to come back from it? Maybe too early to say, though something is clearly broken at Anfield, and not just Lucas' knee ligaments. You could certainly argue, though, overpaying for proven English/British talent would be the anti-Moneyball.

Liverpool have spent the money -- not exactly a "Moneyball" principle, though I'm not sure since I didn't see the movi. The club hasn't exactly looked in different ways to find success that are undervalued -- the true tale of the book.

Contrast that with Arsenal, which has probably been the one club with established success pulling a "Moneyball," as in trying to win with young, talented, attack-minded player instead of spending like crazy with high-priced important and even more insanely priced English talent.

Arsenal did buck its trend a little bit in August -- by necessity -- grabbing Mikel Arteta and Per Mertesacker and it looks like some of the seeds Wenger has sowed -- Alex Song and Koscielny are paying off.

Again, Arsenal seem gun shy in the transfer market, letting Chelsea beat them for Juan Mata, City pry Nasri and Gael Clichy away, etc. The last time Wenger splashed out the big cash, ironically, was for Arshavin -- a true bust.

Both Liverpool and Arsenal want to use their histories to their advantage, but it almost seems a burden as they backslide down the table, unable to surpass the raw spending power of Manchester City and Chelsea, the history of excellence of United and, at the moment, a red-hot Spurs team the envy of the league.

It seems the tactics toward team-building both  traditional powers have taken aren't working, one if not both will miss the Champions League -- five and six points off fourth at the moment -- and the money it brings. Should that happen, will both blow up what's been built up? Or will they embrace the theories of "Moneyball" and look at it in a completely different direction?



Don't Tread, Ever:

When you're Clint Dempsey, you can make this face.

Yuuup. We've officially run out of things to say about how supremely awesome Clint Dempsey is after his second-half hat trick in Fulham's shock 5-1 romp over Newcastle at Craven Cottage, so I just decided to co-opt Mac's letter to Chase Utley from "Sunny." (Note, it's his second after a three-goal game vs. Charlton Athletic in the FA Cup.)

One salient thought, fair play to Eric Wynalda for making a good point on Fox Soccer during "Match Day" in that, why shouldn't Dempsey play striker, or closer to goal for the U.S. National Team?

Got into a great discussion on Twitter with @NateFC, @30frames and @thefarmerjones about the future of Dempsey and if he should play at a "bigger" club? Granted, yes, his value to Fulham is higher than it would be any place else.

It boils down to this, has Dempsey -- with nine EPL goals in 2011-12 -- out-grown a solid, decidedly mid-table team like Fulham?

After watching games this weekend, it's hard to say he couldn't be an asset scoring goals and doing Deuce things for teams like Arsenal, Liverpool or Tottenham. The ball is in his court, since he does have a contract. He'd have to want to force his way out and it doesn't seem like Dempsey's ego is the type to need to play at a Champions League club like most other star players.


FOX FOX FOX FOX:

Before getting into the snark and commentary, fair play to FOX for broadcasting the Arsenal/Manchester United match on most outlets across America live. Once the game started it was the usual feed, featuring Martin Tyler so there weren't any "Married with Children" or "Arsenio Hall" style woofing or cat calls pumped into the sound mix.

Everything else with FOX ... needs some work.

Not going to say anything much about Piers Morgan. Until Sunday I'd heard of him, but never really seen him anywhere -- guess he's a reality judge of "talent" or something. He's certainly part of that me-first "journalism," trying to interject himself into the story as much as possible, as in trying to pick fights with Rio Ferdinand. A creep/troll like Morgan thrives because people talk about him -- god help us if he and Skip Bayless ever joined forces, he seems universally reviled and revels in that fact. All I know is Morgan considered Arsenal a "we" scenario, which is news to me since I didn't know he played for the team.

He also later linked to a Bleacher Report article calling for Wenger's firing, which about sums it up.

Also a rarity? Wynalda(*) isn't the most detested analyst on a studio desk.

There's something ... chitzy? cheesy? greasy? About the way FOX does things. It doesn't have the polish or gravitas of ESPN, which makes you worry about the World Cup.

On Twitter I made plenty of jokes via the #EPLonFOX hashtag, look through it if you want a slight-to-mild chuckle. Overall, I'm bummed, would have loved to know who the cast members of "Glee" picked to win the match.

(*) Interesting to monitor Wynalda trying to bill himself as this voice of reason/truth teller in U.S. Soccer. I'll give him credit, he's not holding back his punches. Plus, from a TV standpoint, he does well as the host when paired with Warren Barton and Christopher Sullivan.

Around the League:

Hey, when you're wrong you;re wrong. Robbie Keane scored two sizzling goals for Aston Villa in a 3-2 win at Wolves, which featured a Pepe-like dirty stomp by Karl Henry. ... But when you're right, patting myself on the back for predicting a massive Swansea City letdown away in a loss to Sunderland on Saturday. ...Fernando Torres picked the right weekend to continue not scoring goals, as his drought will be overshadowed by everything else that happened. Chelsea is missing ... something (duh), though full marks to Norwich City, especially keeper John Ruddy and defenders Zak Whitbread and Daniel Ayala, ex-Liverpool youth player. ...Tough break for Tim Howard in Everton's 1-1 draw with Blackburn. He came off his line to make a catch, collided with a Blackburn player -- no foul was called -- he missed the ball, it felt almost directly on the goal line and was tapped in. Adam Bogdan smiled. ... Harry Redknapp is on trial today for tax evasion, wake me when it's over.

Fantasy Team O' the Week:

D mahon's "Missing Elmander" put up 62 points, thanks to Bale, Dempsey, Lescott and Ali Al-Habsi (who saved a penalty vs. QPR.)

One Other Thing:

Pretty sure I crossed over the threshold from observer, to maybe, possibly a Tottenham fan since that lose today left me irked and dazed for a good hour or two, although it didn't leave me physically sick to my stomach after Billy Cundiff missed a last-second field goal, helping propel the hated Patriots into the Super Bowl, but there was some sort of an empty feeling. 

It was an emotion a fan would experience, instead of the usual asshole hiding behind a keyboard making snarky comments with impunity at every team to tweak people.


Song of the Week:

Nothing's caught my ear, lately. Phantogram's "Don't Move" is pretty catchy, still.

It snowed in Connecticut Saturday, so I spent part of the morning staring out the window, sipping on green tea, listening to Bon Iver, snapped a photo of it with my phone and spend the rest of the day trying to decide which Instagram filter would be best express my inner-most feelings for a profile picture.






It's up to you, the reader, to decide if that's real or a joke.

Labels: Arsenal, English Premier League, EPL, Liverpool, manchester city, manchester United, mario balotelli, Premier League, tottenham