Before we dig into USMNT vs. Guatemala in the Gold Cup opener Thursday night, a moment of housekeeping.
A heartfelt thanks to all the folks who've taken the time to correct my (numerous) errors made since I reintroduced comments to this ol' blog. Peer editing is a fantastic thing. Personal editing has never quite been my bag, baby.
Plus after staring at my monitor screen my eye balls feel about ready to burst come editing time.
Next, over the course of my blogging here perhaps my favorite personal post title came in March 2007 in advance of a friendly between these two same teams, "This is why I'm Guat." I was tempted to use it again, but friends, there's no cheating in blogging, especially after Thursday night's "game".
Excuse the delayed lede, because that game, much like the encounter in March left a blood-like substance trickling out of my optic cavities. Since this is a results based business the US will gladly take the 1-0 win and three points and run. Let's hope most of America was not-watching the NBA Finals instead of not-watching this Gold Cup group stage game.
Let's chalk this abomination in Carson, Calif., to two things:
1. Guatemala's, Larry David-would-be-proud, cynical tactics. The Guate's put forth the anti-beautiful game display to an absolute T. (Yes, I'll use Guate, since that's on their federation's badge.)
2. The US all of a sudden deciding that they were technically superior to the Guate's and allowing themselves to get caught up in a punch-and-judy type second half after failing to go up 2-0 in the first half.
For all the aesthetically pleasing footie the US displayed in their 4-1 thrashing of China six days earlier, this one had none of it. Former US boss Bora Milutinović would have been proud of this slog.
Where did that fun-to-watch, attacking, one-touch footie go? Why was Guatemala able to hack it away so easily?
Again, it's a results based business and three points are three points.
Before dissecting the ins-and-outs of the game itself, another quick word on the CONCACAF officials. Did someone from CONCACAF troll around the streets of Torrance and pluck three guys looking for work off to officiate the match? Not to sound like and insensitive, racist, jerkass, but let's call a spade here. Sorry if you're offended. The officiating Thursday night offended me.
Honduran ref Jose Pineda was simply awful. Awful isn't even a good enough word.
In fact all of Thesaurus.com's 35 terms for awful would suffice:
Ok, maybe not grody...eh...the game was in SoCal. (I guess all the empty seats early in the game were for people at the Anaheim Ducks victory celebration.)
This complaining about the ref isn't sour grapes here because Oguchi Oneywu got two silly yellow cards after being (bear) baited by those crafty Guates.
Pineda allowed Guatemala's 'kick a shin, kick a ball, shove everything in sight' tactics to turn the second half into a Grade A Shit Show, first class. Numerous times Carlos Quincones blatantly ran over American players without so much as a whistle.
Is this the price of regional success? Was this all because the Home Depot Center crowd was decidedly un-American? (I'd love some first hand accounts from the HDC.)
For all the criticisms of CONCACAF, first at the top of the list is officiating. The officiating at last summer's World Cup was bad enough. Imagine if they actually included a CONCACAF guy, it might have taken four yellow cards and a hotel on Baltic Ave. to get ejected from a game.
Still, this does not excuse the American's shoddy performance, at best. You simply can't hang your hat on out-shooting Guatemala 7-6.
When the Clint Dempsey scored in the 26th minute normally you'd think the game would get better, as it would force Guatemala to come out of its shell. Nope. It got worse and got me back into the 'I hate Internationals' camp.
The final 50-odd minutes of this game were sloppy, disorganized and foul-filled. I almost don't even want to write about it.
To their credit, Guatemala kept at it's despicable game plan and throughly got under the Americans skin. One of the great things about soccer is that you can play in any different number of ways. It's a shame the Guates decided on this ticky-tack order. Then again, considering that Guatemala had a Noriega on it's team there was in fact only one way to play -- GRIMEY.
It's more of a shame that the US allowed itself to get dragged into this slog. There was no reason, no matter how pesky Ruiz might be, for Oneywu to allow the red mist to descend.
Again, it's just one game and the USMNT did pull the full three points. And it's probably not all that fair to write off a performance where they did hold on for 15 minutes with only 10 guys.
Let's break it down for some other stuff...
The Goal: The goal itself was very nice from the US. Jonathan Bornstein began the sequence with, say, a 30-yard looping pass to DaMarcus Beasley, who headed down to Taylor Twellman. The Revolution-man beat his defender to the touchline and centered to an on-rushing Dempsey, who tapped it in. Too bad that was about it, though the Twellman missed an open header toward the end of the first half and the team couldn't poke home a free ball right at the death of the first.
Bobbing for tackles: So how was Bob Bradley's first game as coach in a game that actually mattered? Probably in the 'C' range. Didn't like going with the straight 4-4-2 alignment to start the game. Considering the Guate's were happy to sit back, let Ruiz shiv the defenders by himself and gun for the draw, a 4-3-3/4-5-1 (with Beasley/Dempsey withdrawn wide) would have likely confused the opponents. It's not like it would have been opening yourself up for the Guatemalan attack, either. And playing Donovan on the right wing and Dempsey at forward put both guys out of their preferred roles. The first two Bradley subs -- Eddie Johnson for Taylor Twellman and Steve Ralston for Clint Dempsey were okay. At least he made the wise move to throw out Jay DeMerit for Feilhaber when the team was reduced to 10.
Young Guns: After jointly excelling Saturday vs. China, it was a mixed bag for Benny Feilhaber and Michael Bradley. Despite shaving off his sideburns, Feilhaber continued his excellent run of play. Nothing that jumped off the page, but kept stirring the drink. On the other hand...Bradley pulled the ol' Donnie Kerabatsos, as in he was totally out of his element. The coach's son was poor, and that's being nice.
Disappearing Acts: After a stunning, assertive, "I'm Back Bitches" display against China, Beasley didn't do all that much Thursday night. In fairness, every time he touched the ball he got hacked. There's not many excuses for Eddie Johnson's lack of attacking verve. Take a crack at goal son, please. Yes, laying it off for teammates is good play, but take an attempt. Please. You're coming off back-to-back hat tricks, albeit MLS hat trick, but hat tricks nonetheless. And wearing the captain's armband for the second consecutive game Carlos Bocanegra had a night to forget. As for the man we affectionately call 'The Gooch'...no comment.
Running Items Dept: Landon Donovan. (Deep breaht) Well, Land-man didn't play that bad out of the wing and even took a halfway cheap shot in the chops (and crumpled up like he was shot, mind you). Still, his service from corners and free kicks is sub par. Why didn't the Beaz take one? Or Feilhaber? Donovan wasn't wearing the captain's armband, so why keep deferring to him? From my vantage point on the couch Landy only had one of his long, trademark loping runs.
Miscellania: I kill ESPN without abandon, so I have one bone to pick with FSC's presentation. Not one, ONE, replay of Oneywu's second yellow? Is this amateur hour? ... Still, Max Bretos and Christopher Sullivan blow anything ESPN has out of the water, not that that's saying all that much. You can do an American soccer broadcast without pom-poms and lame backstories. Plus I love Sullivan's indiscriminate accent and how he always goes for 'football' in lieu of 'soccer'. ... Speaking of ESPN, around minute 23 I flipped to ESPN2 for Colorado/Houston in MLS. Heard an interchange between Dave O'Brien and Tommy Smythe, nearly choked on my General Tso and promptly changed back before blacking out. ... How many US players will rue missing chances at comedy keeper Ricardo Trigueño (Bananas) Foster. Keep flappin' them arms, son. ... No, Guatemala sub Luis Swisher is not related to Nick Swisher. ... Love him or hate him, and you're in one camp or the other, but Frankie Hedjuk was his typical self on the flank, sans two-foot sliding tackle. ... Time for the cult of DeMerit to creep out of the woodwork again, no? ... Probably the best performance by an American player was from Tim Howard. He made his two saves and commanded the box well.
Is it good or bad there's only one day off before playing Trinidad AND Tobago on Saturday afternoon? Expect some major lineup changes?
Final Word: Today it goes to the one and only 'Trader Pops' Cardillo, "They were lucky to win."
Well said.
Now, is there anyway to find a machine featured in movies like 'Total Recall' and or 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind'? I need my memory erased for the last two hours. (And it wouldn't be too bad to wake up with Sharon Stone next to me in bed. Even the 2007 vintage, not 1991. She's still pretty spry.)
In any event. Like Pavlov's dog, I must simply type the next line or I will not be able to sleep tonight. Sorry.
Quaid...start the reactors...
Sorry.
Around the world, around the world, around the world
** Two semi-strange signings this week in Europe.
First, we have Brasilian legend Roberto Carlos leaving (possible) La Liga champs Real Madrid for Turkish side Fenerbache. (So this one time, I was at 7-11 and met a kid in a Fenerbache hat...) Surprising Carlos wanted to take the money in such a volatile geo-political state as the Bosporus. Plus those Galatassary fans like to wield knives.
Whatever. Enjoy Roberto Carlos' most famous moment, a moment that will last forever.
The other strange move was French International Franck Ribery moving to Bayern Munich. This one is a noodle-scratcher. During the year the scar-faced, Muslim-convert spoke of moving to a big club in England or Spain -- think Arsenal or Real Madrid. To move to Bayern, which misses the Champions League, is suspicious. Hope he and Luca Toni can get along.
** One move I did like was Newcastle United inking former 'Boro-man Mark Viduka. I'm a yuge Captain Oz fan. Let's hope he and Michael Owen can produce some magic. Big Sam Allardyce is also making overtures for Czech International David Rozenthal and Manchester City madman Joey Barton. Keep him away from the cigarettes.
** In case you missed it, heck of a tally from Julian De Guzman for Canada vs. Costa Rica. Good stuff.
** Finally, here are you games that matter in La Liga this weekend...Saturday...Real Zaragoza v. Real Madrid (Goltv 3 p.m.)...Barcelona v. Espanyol (Goltv, 5...Derby alert!!!)...Mallorca v. Sevilla (Goltv 7 p.m.)
Adios amigos.
A heartfelt thanks to all the folks who've taken the time to correct my (numerous) errors made since I reintroduced comments to this ol' blog. Peer editing is a fantastic thing. Personal editing has never quite been my bag, baby.
Plus after staring at my monitor screen my eye balls feel about ready to burst come editing time.
Next, over the course of my blogging here perhaps my favorite personal post title came in March 2007 in advance of a friendly between these two same teams, "This is why I'm Guat." I was tempted to use it again, but friends, there's no cheating in blogging, especially after Thursday night's "game".
Excuse the delayed lede, because that game, much like the encounter in March left a blood-like substance trickling out of my optic cavities. Since this is a results based business the US will gladly take the 1-0 win and three points and run. Let's hope most of America was not-watching the NBA Finals instead of not-watching this Gold Cup group stage game.
Let's chalk this abomination in Carson, Calif., to two things:
1. Guatemala's, Larry David-would-be-proud, cynical tactics. The Guate's put forth the anti-beautiful game display to an absolute T. (Yes, I'll use Guate, since that's on their federation's badge.)
2. The US all of a sudden deciding that they were technically superior to the Guate's and allowing themselves to get caught up in a punch-and-judy type second half after failing to go up 2-0 in the first half.
For all the aesthetically pleasing footie the US displayed in their 4-1 thrashing of China six days earlier, this one had none of it. Former US boss Bora Milutinović would have been proud of this slog.
Where did that fun-to-watch, attacking, one-touch footie go? Why was Guatemala able to hack it away so easily?
Again, it's a results based business and three points are three points.
Before dissecting the ins-and-outs of the game itself, another quick word on the CONCACAF officials. Did someone from CONCACAF troll around the streets of Torrance and pluck three guys looking for work off to officiate the match? Not to sound like and insensitive, racist, jerkass, but let's call a spade here. Sorry if you're offended. The officiating Thursday night offended me.
Honduran ref Jose Pineda was simply awful. Awful isn't even a good enough word.
In fact all of Thesaurus.com's 35 terms for awful would suffice:
abominable, alarming, appalling, atrocious, bad, deplorable, depressing, dire, disgusting, distressing, dreadful, fearful, frightful, ghastly, grody, gross, gruesome, grungy, harrowing, hideous, horrendous, horrible, horrific, horrifying, nasty, offensive, raunchy, repulsive, shocking, stinking, synthetic, tough, ugly, unpleasant, unsightly
Ok, maybe not grody...eh...the game was in SoCal. (I guess all the empty seats early in the game were for people at the Anaheim Ducks victory celebration.)
This complaining about the ref isn't sour grapes here because Oguchi Oneywu got two silly yellow cards after being (bear) baited by those crafty Guates.
Pineda allowed Guatemala's 'kick a shin, kick a ball, shove everything in sight' tactics to turn the second half into a Grade A Shit Show, first class. Numerous times Carlos Quincones blatantly ran over American players without so much as a whistle.
Is this the price of regional success? Was this all because the Home Depot Center crowd was decidedly un-American? (I'd love some first hand accounts from the HDC.)
For all the criticisms of CONCACAF, first at the top of the list is officiating. The officiating at last summer's World Cup was bad enough. Imagine if they actually included a CONCACAF guy, it might have taken four yellow cards and a hotel on Baltic Ave. to get ejected from a game.
Still, this does not excuse the American's shoddy performance, at best. You simply can't hang your hat on out-shooting Guatemala 7-6.
When the Clint Dempsey scored in the 26th minute normally you'd think the game would get better, as it would force Guatemala to come out of its shell. Nope. It got worse and got me back into the 'I hate Internationals' camp.
The final 50-odd minutes of this game were sloppy, disorganized and foul-filled. I almost don't even want to write about it.
To their credit, Guatemala kept at it's despicable game plan and throughly got under the Americans skin. One of the great things about soccer is that you can play in any different number of ways. It's a shame the Guates decided on this ticky-tack order. Then again, considering that Guatemala had a Noriega on it's team there was in fact only one way to play -- GRIMEY.
It's more of a shame that the US allowed itself to get dragged into this slog. There was no reason, no matter how pesky Ruiz might be, for Oneywu to allow the red mist to descend.
Again, it's just one game and the USMNT did pull the full three points. And it's probably not all that fair to write off a performance where they did hold on for 15 minutes with only 10 guys.
Let's break it down for some other stuff...
The Goal: The goal itself was very nice from the US. Jonathan Bornstein began the sequence with, say, a 30-yard looping pass to DaMarcus Beasley, who headed down to Taylor Twellman. The Revolution-man beat his defender to the touchline and centered to an on-rushing Dempsey, who tapped it in. Too bad that was about it, though the Twellman missed an open header toward the end of the first half and the team couldn't poke home a free ball right at the death of the first.
Bobbing for tackles: So how was Bob Bradley's first game as coach in a game that actually mattered? Probably in the 'C' range. Didn't like going with the straight 4-4-2 alignment to start the game. Considering the Guate's were happy to sit back, let Ruiz shiv the defenders by himself and gun for the draw, a 4-3-3/4-5-1 (with Beasley/Dempsey withdrawn wide) would have likely confused the opponents. It's not like it would have been opening yourself up for the Guatemalan attack, either. And playing Donovan on the right wing and Dempsey at forward put both guys out of their preferred roles. The first two Bradley subs -- Eddie Johnson for Taylor Twellman and Steve Ralston for Clint Dempsey were okay. At least he made the wise move to throw out Jay DeMerit for Feilhaber when the team was reduced to 10.
Young Guns: After jointly excelling Saturday vs. China, it was a mixed bag for Benny Feilhaber and Michael Bradley. Despite shaving off his sideburns, Feilhaber continued his excellent run of play. Nothing that jumped off the page, but kept stirring the drink. On the other hand...Bradley pulled the ol' Donnie Kerabatsos, as in he was totally out of his element. The coach's son was poor, and that's being nice.
Disappearing Acts: After a stunning, assertive, "I'm Back Bitches" display against China, Beasley didn't do all that much Thursday night. In fairness, every time he touched the ball he got hacked. There's not many excuses for Eddie Johnson's lack of attacking verve. Take a crack at goal son, please. Yes, laying it off for teammates is good play, but take an attempt. Please. You're coming off back-to-back hat tricks, albeit MLS hat trick, but hat tricks nonetheless. And wearing the captain's armband for the second consecutive game Carlos Bocanegra had a night to forget. As for the man we affectionately call 'The Gooch'...no comment.
Running Items Dept: Landon Donovan. (Deep breaht) Well, Land-man didn't play that bad out of the wing and even took a halfway cheap shot in the chops (and crumpled up like he was shot, mind you). Still, his service from corners and free kicks is sub par. Why didn't the Beaz take one? Or Feilhaber? Donovan wasn't wearing the captain's armband, so why keep deferring to him? From my vantage point on the couch Landy only had one of his long, trademark loping runs.
Miscellania: I kill ESPN without abandon, so I have one bone to pick with FSC's presentation. Not one, ONE, replay of Oneywu's second yellow? Is this amateur hour? ... Still, Max Bretos and Christopher Sullivan blow anything ESPN has out of the water, not that that's saying all that much. You can do an American soccer broadcast without pom-poms and lame backstories. Plus I love Sullivan's indiscriminate accent and how he always goes for 'football' in lieu of 'soccer'. ... Speaking of ESPN, around minute 23 I flipped to ESPN2 for Colorado/Houston in MLS. Heard an interchange between Dave O'Brien and Tommy Smythe, nearly choked on my General Tso and promptly changed back before blacking out. ... How many US players will rue missing chances at comedy keeper Ricardo Trigueño (Bananas) Foster. Keep flappin' them arms, son. ... No, Guatemala sub Luis Swisher is not related to Nick Swisher. ... Love him or hate him, and you're in one camp or the other, but Frankie Hedjuk was his typical self on the flank, sans two-foot sliding tackle. ... Time for the cult of DeMerit to creep out of the woodwork again, no? ... Probably the best performance by an American player was from Tim Howard. He made his two saves and commanded the box well.
Is it good or bad there's only one day off before playing Trinidad AND Tobago on Saturday afternoon? Expect some major lineup changes?
Final Word: Today it goes to the one and only 'Trader Pops' Cardillo, "They were lucky to win."
Well said.
Now, is there anyway to find a machine featured in movies like 'Total Recall' and or 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind'? I need my memory erased for the last two hours. (And it wouldn't be too bad to wake up with Sharon Stone next to me in bed. Even the 2007 vintage, not 1991. She's still pretty spry.)
In any event. Like Pavlov's dog, I must simply type the next line or I will not be able to sleep tonight. Sorry.
Quaid...start the reactors...
Sorry.
Around the world, around the world, around the world
** Two semi-strange signings this week in Europe.
First, we have Brasilian legend Roberto Carlos leaving (possible) La Liga champs Real Madrid for Turkish side Fenerbache. (So this one time, I was at 7-11 and met a kid in a Fenerbache hat...) Surprising Carlos wanted to take the money in such a volatile geo-political state as the Bosporus. Plus those Galatassary fans like to wield knives.
Whatever. Enjoy Roberto Carlos' most famous moment, a moment that will last forever.
The other strange move was French International Franck Ribery moving to Bayern Munich. This one is a noodle-scratcher. During the year the scar-faced, Muslim-convert spoke of moving to a big club in England or Spain -- think Arsenal or Real Madrid. To move to Bayern, which misses the Champions League, is suspicious. Hope he and Luca Toni can get along.
** One move I did like was Newcastle United inking former 'Boro-man Mark Viduka. I'm a yuge Captain Oz fan. Let's hope he and Michael Owen can produce some magic. Big Sam Allardyce is also making overtures for Czech International David Rozenthal and Manchester City madman Joey Barton. Keep him away from the cigarettes.
** In case you missed it, heck of a tally from Julian De Guzman for Canada vs. Costa Rica. Good stuff.
** Finally, here are you games that matter in La Liga this weekend...Saturday...Real Zaragoza v. Real Madrid (Goltv 3 p.m.)...Barcelona v. Espanyol (Goltv, 5...Derby alert!!!)...Mallorca v. Sevilla (Goltv 7 p.m.)
Adios amigos.
I really didn't think we played all that bad, excepting Johnson. Guate had few quality chances.
We aren't used to playing such cheap players. It's one thing to go hard and take cheap shots at the other team, but it made it so much worse that they flopped constantly and got so many calls. One thing I can say about the Americans is that a dive is few and far between.
Anyways, I was proud of the performance.
Glad I missed the USA game. Sounds awful. Has Coacher Bob B. ever said anything about the captaincy? Personally don't think Landy has "it" but do like Carlos B with the armband. He's gotta a little fire. In the transfer market, they are playing swap a midfielder as Barton signed with Newcastle, Scott Parker signed with West Ham and Reo-Cooker is strongly rumored to land at Aston Villa. Nice post today although I can't quite tell if you enjoyed the USA game/officiating.
Great review.
Agreed that it was an uhhhh-gly second half by the yanks. While the backline was decent, I would've liked DeMerit to get in earlier to bring the nasty.
Carlos Ruiz is a bitch. Yeah, he's talented, blah, blah, blah. But it's erased by his antics after every phantom tackle.
I was surprised with Guatemala's speed. They definitely didn't show that in the friendly a few weeks back.
Plus, I'm still undecided if Bretos/Sullivan is that good or O'Brien/Wynalda is that bad.
I thought the goat of the match was Bob Bradley. Having DVRed the match, I know it was useless to be yelling at the screen to get Onyewu out of there, but come on, the man was totally frustrated and largely out of sync. I didn't really see the kick out on his first card, but his second one (knocking Ruiz(?) off his feet when Bocanegra easily had the ball covered) was an easy call. Hell, about 5 minutes earlier, I thought Onyewu should have gotten his second yellow for a hard, stupid foul. My point is, I guess, that it was obviously coming and he should have been substituted.
Feilhaber looked impressive again. Beasley took 10+ shots from behind but never took himself out of the game. Howard didn't blow it, which he could have done a couple of times, so that was nice. DeMerit played hard while he was in there, but I still can't decide if he is truly a decent defender, or merely the hardest working guy out there.
One word of advice to all-don't fall for the movie hype. I watched this match late last night because I had gone to see Knocked Up. It feels like the movie was put together by one of the stoners who can't put together a sentence within the movie. Slow, and full of characters you want to strangle. Go track down Hot Fuzz again instead.
If you'll indulge me...
*Dreadful finishing from the Americans. Even Dempsey's goal would have had a good chance of being blocked by a competent keeper.
*At a certain point, it seemed to me that Beasley played not to suffer a career-threatening injury at the hands of a Guatemalan player. I don't blame him.
*More naive, Gooch or Mr. Pineda?
*In general, I wish our defenders had the maturity/awareness to recognize that Guatemala was playing long balls forward to attackers who were not trying to make a play on the ball. There's no need to mark a player closely when he wants to run into you and draw a foul rather than gain possession of the ball on his own.
*Donovan was pretty good on the wing. I suspect he would have been marked/beaten out of the match had he played more centrally. Plus, it gets Dempsey into a more central role which I think is a good thing.
*Twellman may be good enough to play center-forward against CONCACAF teams.
*Bocanegra's best football for Fulham came (much to my surprise) playing a holding midfield role. Fielhaber and/or Bradley need someone to play that role behind them at this point in their careers. This would also have the benefit of getting Jay Demerit on the pitch. It would be nice to have a central defender out there who, though he may get beaten, won't do something horribly foolish. An Onyewu/Bocanegra pairing in central defense almost guarantees some sort of disaster of their own making will have to be averted.
*Bornstein is not good.
Can I just weigh in on Alexi Lalas' Keith Hernandez moment yesterday? Did that guy actually volunteer to drive Beckham to the airport? Lalas has a mancrush on Beckham, and volunteering to drive him to the airport.
http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story?id=437327&cc=5901
As Kramer says to Jerry, "Don't you have any pride or self respect? I mean, how can you prostitute yourself like this? I mean what are you going to do? You're going to start driving him to the airport?
I agree with most of your review. The officiating was atrocious, but until we can develop some American referees, we will be stuck with Hispanic referees who are used to seeing that type of play in the Central American leagues. Unfortunately the officiating in MLS is usually on par with a high school game, so there is little hope for the near future.
I have to disagree with you on the Michael Bradley comment. I thought he broke up alot of Guate attacking movement, and distributed the ball decently. My goat of the match would be Twellman. He had an excellent pass on the goal, but his missed wide open header was unforgivable. Bretos said he makes that "9 times out of ten", but the 9 times are in MLS and the tenth always seems to be on the national team. If you go back and watch before the goal, his poor passing breaks up four attacking runs.
To the previous, anonymous, post:
US referees would not be allowed to officiate US matches. So, unless we can convince the rest of CONCACAF that such play is too ugly and rough on our pretty boys and could they please change, we'll probably see the same thing over and over.