Blast this lousy Smarch weather.
What is the deal with New England weather.
Ok, so let's start with a one-time imponderable question which kept me up at nights during my years in high school during the mid to late 1990s -- which was a better comedy, "The Simpsons" or "Seinfeld." (Let's just say these days Jerry and George don't age too well. How old are they supposed to be?)
Anyways, if you're astute enough you'll pick up on the two overt references to the shows, which are used to sum up my current health. Tuesday I wake up feeling like crud. Wednesday I feel great. Thursday its back to the crud list.
Come Thursday night, for whatever reason, I decided it would be a good service to the entire Intra-nets to view the first offering of ESPN's 2008 MLS Primetime Thursday -- a double-header featuring Chicago/New England and San Jose/Galaxy. It's hardly news how much I disdain the 'Worldwide Leaders' coverage of the beautiful game. First and foremost, its broadcast of the Flying Beckhams v. Chelsea, which may or may not have triggered our current wintery economic climate.
At least it turned out to be a semi-historic night as Beckham notched his first MLS goal in the Galaxy's 2-0 stroll over the revived Earthquakes. In other words, dust off the old VCR.
Let's dust off an old and blatantly unoriginal gimmick to run down the doubleheader.
The Good -- No sign of Dave O'Brien. (Sorry, couldn't help myself.) ... The Section 8 Chicago fans, who kept it up throughout the rain. From the angle of the camera it looked very lively all night. Their best moment, singing strands of the White Strips, 'The Hardest Button to Button.' And, of course, the smoke bombs. ... Blanco. As American I must hate him, but the hombre can ball. ... ESPN acknowledging the season had already started and that FSC actually exists. ... MLS's 'Football, Futbol, Soccer' self-advertising campaign. For a change it looks first-rate. ... Tomasz Frankowski, the new Polish rifle, bagged a brace and seems like he still has something left. ... The Los Angeles fans that still rock the yellow and green. Stay true. ... Definitely enjoy the self-made player introductions, a la Monday Night Football. ... Donovan's nice ball to Beckham on the first Galaxy goal, and Beckham's subsequent nutmeg of Joe Cannon. ... Kobe Bryant, or more specifically, Vanessa Bryant in Beckham's private box. It's been said before, but Kobe had the chance to be pretty nasty as a soccer player. If Peter Crouch can play at 6-foot-7, it seems remotely feasible Bryant could find a spot on the pitch. ... Beckham's link-up with the Donovan, which made it 2-0. ... ESPN toning down the Beckham-centric worship for a change, except for the unnecessary halftime breakdown. ... The atmosphere at both games. It's definitely much more tolerable to watch a game played in front of a lively crowd in a soccer-specific-stadium. ...
The Bad -- Pedro Gomez. Doesn't anyone else at the WWL speak Spanish? ... New England's much touted Gambian duo after round one were equally ineffective in Chicago. ... The rash red card on Jeff Larentowicz in the first half. Yes, it was a clumsy challenge, but not a no-brainer sending off. Made the game essentially unwatchable. Admittedly, when it got to 4-0 at the half, I popped in an episode of 'The Prisoner' on my laptop. (I AM NOT A NUMBER!) ... The Galaxy lineup outside of Donovan, Beckham, Chris Klein and Greg Vanney -- who are these fucking guys. (Apologies to 'Major League.') ... San Jose should get a lot better, but Thursday they were woeful and made the Galaxy look like world-beaters. ... ESPN showing the midweek UEFA Champions League highlights 18 times, but never once mentioning the CONCACAF Champions Cup, which is slightly more relevant to MLS.
The Ugly -- New England's new uniforms. Is the red swath necessary? Same for the new-look San Jose kits. Brutal. ... A shot of fans waving a Club America banner during an MLS season opening montage. ... The Ben Olsen-starring Dick's Sporting Goods store ad. ... Alexi Lalas, how did you assemble a team like this?
The Beckham game -- Really bored? (well you must be if you're watching these games) Want to get wasted? Play the Beckham game during any ESPN telecast. Drink once anytime Beckham is said. Twice if its David Beckham. Five for a Posh mention. Ten for any of his kids. Believe me, you won't last too long. (In case you were wondering, here's your Beckham tally: Rob Stone 17 mentions; J.P. Dellacamra 55 Beckhams; John Harkes 26. Julie Foudy eight.)
Final thoughts -- New England won't go too far without Ralston and Twellman. Chicago will continue to get better, as long as Blanco is in form. The Galaxy will need superhuman games each week from Donovan and Beckham to stay competitive. San Jose will struggle big time to score goals. Also, in fairness, ESPN's production seems significantly better. I wonder why?
Beckham himself was pretty good too, though he kept getting ticked off when his teammates didn't pass to him when he was wide open in acres of space. Watching him you can notice he know how to play his position far better than his teammates. He's not just chasing after the ball, like six year old AYSO kids.
________________________
Saturday
* Arsenal v. Liverpool -- (7:45 a.m., Setanta) So very strange here, as it's the second of third successive games between these two teams in seven days. How the teams come out and play this one, with the showdown in the Champions League at Anfield looming is beyond me. History would lend you to think that Rafa Benetiz sits all his big guns, now that they're five clear of Everton for fourth place. There's almost no way the new Mr. Glass, Robin Van Persie, plays Saturday, even if Arsenal still has a punchers chance at the Prem title. ... Arsenal 1, Liverpool 0
* Newcastle United v. Reading -- (10 a.m., FSC) A win for the Magpies puts the relegation question to bed once and for all. A Royals win almost assures top flight safety. The way that Newcastle plays, can you expect two solid performances in-a-row? Even at home? This match also doubles as an underachievers bowl, or maybe more specifically an underservers bowl. Neither side did much of anything this season, but skated by and will likely survive to play another day. It's nice to be bad, as long as their are historically bad teams below you. ... Newcastle 2, Reading 1
* Aston Villa v. Bolton -- (Noon, FSC, delayed) Though it sits eighth in the table, Aston Villa might be a team primed for the taking as the long grind finally takes hold of the razor-thin squad. That said, Bolton's last gasp probably came last weekend when they wasted two first half goal from Matty Taylor and lost three vital points to Arsenal in the rain of the Reebok. After a crushing loss like that, it's hard to factor the Trotters players will have much resolve left, with most of their attention on the mobile phones and agents trying to find a new gig. Let's be honest, who wouldn't want El Hadj Diouf in their squad? Are you listening MLS? ... Aston Villa 2, Bolon 0
* Wigan Athletic v. Birmingham City -- To the dismay of the footballing populace, Wigan can basically move into almost into safety with a win. Brum sits four above the trapdoor into the Championship. Maybe the edge here goes to the hosts, since Steve Bruce managed the opposition and should know some of their tricks. ... Wigan 1, Birmingham City 0
* Blackburn Rovers v. Tottenham -- Meh. Pretty much a nothing game, which could make it pretty entertaining if guys like David Bentley and Aaron Lennon get a little space to operate. Ok, this isn't exactly a nothing game. Blackburn could still make the UEFA Cup, but since they've already applied for the InterToto Cup (double-wonderful) they have a good shot if they don't finish sixth. Anyways, try explaining the InterToto cup to a non-soccer fan sometime and your head just might explode. ... Rovers 2, Spurs 2
* Manchester City v. Chelsea -- (10 a.m., Setanta) Ethical question, if you're Manchester City do you lay down here in order to screw over your cross-city rivals in leaders Manchester United? That shouldn't matter, if City has any pride left they go at it full bore against an angered Chelsea squad returning from Turkey. ... City 1, Chelsea 2
* Fulham v. Sunderland -- (10 a.m., Setanta Broadband) For the upteenth week in a row, Fulham must win to keep its flicking hopes alive. Sunderland broke its massive away losing streak, last week so you'd think two straight road wins might be asking for too much. ... Fulham 1, Sunderland 1
Sunday
* Middlesbrough v. Manchester United -- (8:30 Setanta) 'Boro has impacted the title race, beating Arsenal, tripping up Liverpool. Yet unless Garerth Southgate's gargoyle -like gaze can turn Cristiano Ronaldo to stone the Tessiders aren't mustering much of a speed bump come Sunday. ... 'Boro 0, Manchester United 2
* Everton v. Derby -- (4:30 p.m., FSC delayed) Everton gets a much needed and deserved tomato can after a strong of difficult matches. Question, which team overpays for Derby's Emmanuel Villa over the summer? ... Everton 2, Derby 1
Bonus match: Barnsley v. Cardiff City, FA Cup semifinals (11 a.m., FSC) Take away the cavernous setting at Wembley Stadium, and what's the big difference between the level of play in this match compared to some of MLS, or any second-tier league for that matter?
Last week: 9-1
Season: 162-155
What is the deal with New England weather.
Ok, so let's start with a one-time imponderable question which kept me up at nights during my years in high school during the mid to late 1990s -- which was a better comedy, "The Simpsons" or "Seinfeld." (Let's just say these days Jerry and George don't age too well. How old are they supposed to be?)
Anyways, if you're astute enough you'll pick up on the two overt references to the shows, which are used to sum up my current health. Tuesday I wake up feeling like crud. Wednesday I feel great. Thursday its back to the crud list.
Come Thursday night, for whatever reason, I decided it would be a good service to the entire Intra-nets to view the first offering of ESPN's 2008 MLS Primetime Thursday -- a double-header featuring Chicago/New England and San Jose/Galaxy. It's hardly news how much I disdain the 'Worldwide Leaders' coverage of the beautiful game. First and foremost, its broadcast of the Flying Beckhams v. Chelsea, which may or may not have triggered our current wintery economic climate.
At least it turned out to be a semi-historic night as Beckham notched his first MLS goal in the Galaxy's 2-0 stroll over the revived Earthquakes. In other words, dust off the old VCR.
Let's dust off an old and blatantly unoriginal gimmick to run down the doubleheader.
The Good -- No sign of Dave O'Brien. (Sorry, couldn't help myself.) ... The Section 8 Chicago fans, who kept it up throughout the rain. From the angle of the camera it looked very lively all night. Their best moment, singing strands of the White Strips, 'The Hardest Button to Button.' And, of course, the smoke bombs. ... Blanco. As American I must hate him, but the hombre can ball. ... ESPN acknowledging the season had already started and that FSC actually exists. ... MLS's 'Football, Futbol, Soccer' self-advertising campaign. For a change it looks first-rate. ... Tomasz Frankowski, the new Polish rifle, bagged a brace and seems like he still has something left. ... The Los Angeles fans that still rock the yellow and green. Stay true. ... Definitely enjoy the self-made player introductions, a la Monday Night Football. ... Donovan's nice ball to Beckham on the first Galaxy goal, and Beckham's subsequent nutmeg of Joe Cannon. ... Kobe Bryant, or more specifically, Vanessa Bryant in Beckham's private box. It's been said before, but Kobe had the chance to be pretty nasty as a soccer player. If Peter Crouch can play at 6-foot-7, it seems remotely feasible Bryant could find a spot on the pitch. ... Beckham's link-up with the Donovan, which made it 2-0. ... ESPN toning down the Beckham-centric worship for a change, except for the unnecessary halftime breakdown. ... The atmosphere at both games. It's definitely much more tolerable to watch a game played in front of a lively crowd in a soccer-specific-stadium. ...
The Bad -- Pedro Gomez. Doesn't anyone else at the WWL speak Spanish? ... New England's much touted Gambian duo after round one were equally ineffective in Chicago. ... The rash red card on Jeff Larentowicz in the first half. Yes, it was a clumsy challenge, but not a no-brainer sending off. Made the game essentially unwatchable. Admittedly, when it got to 4-0 at the half, I popped in an episode of 'The Prisoner' on my laptop. (I AM NOT A NUMBER!) ... The Galaxy lineup outside of Donovan, Beckham, Chris Klein and Greg Vanney -- who are these fucking guys. (Apologies to 'Major League.') ... San Jose should get a lot better, but Thursday they were woeful and made the Galaxy look like world-beaters. ... ESPN showing the midweek UEFA Champions League highlights 18 times, but never once mentioning the CONCACAF Champions Cup, which is slightly more relevant to MLS.
The Ugly -- New England's new uniforms. Is the red swath necessary? Same for the new-look San Jose kits. Brutal. ... A shot of fans waving a Club America banner during an MLS season opening montage. ... The Ben Olsen-starring Dick's Sporting Goods store ad. ... Alexi Lalas, how did you assemble a team like this?
The Beckham game -- Really bored? (well you must be if you're watching these games) Want to get wasted? Play the Beckham game during any ESPN telecast. Drink once anytime Beckham is said. Twice if its David Beckham. Five for a Posh mention. Ten for any of his kids. Believe me, you won't last too long. (In case you were wondering, here's your Beckham tally: Rob Stone 17 mentions; J.P. Dellacamra 55 Beckhams; John Harkes 26. Julie Foudy eight.)
Final thoughts -- New England won't go too far without Ralston and Twellman. Chicago will continue to get better, as long as Blanco is in form. The Galaxy will need superhuman games each week from Donovan and Beckham to stay competitive. San Jose will struggle big time to score goals. Also, in fairness, ESPN's production seems significantly better. I wonder why?
Beckham himself was pretty good too, though he kept getting ticked off when his teammates didn't pass to him when he was wide open in acres of space. Watching him you can notice he know how to play his position far better than his teammates. He's not just chasing after the ball, like six year old AYSO kids.
Saturday
* Arsenal v. Liverpool -- (7:45 a.m., Setanta) So very strange here, as it's the second of third successive games between these two teams in seven days. How the teams come out and play this one, with the showdown in the Champions League at Anfield looming is beyond me. History would lend you to think that Rafa Benetiz sits all his big guns, now that they're five clear of Everton for fourth place. There's almost no way the new Mr. Glass, Robin Van Persie, plays Saturday, even if Arsenal still has a punchers chance at the Prem title. ... Arsenal 1, Liverpool 0
* Newcastle United v. Reading -- (10 a.m., FSC) A win for the Magpies puts the relegation question to bed once and for all. A Royals win almost assures top flight safety. The way that Newcastle plays, can you expect two solid performances in-a-row? Even at home? This match also doubles as an underachievers bowl, or maybe more specifically an underservers bowl. Neither side did much of anything this season, but skated by and will likely survive to play another day. It's nice to be bad, as long as their are historically bad teams below you. ... Newcastle 2, Reading 1
* Aston Villa v. Bolton -- (Noon, FSC, delayed) Though it sits eighth in the table, Aston Villa might be a team primed for the taking as the long grind finally takes hold of the razor-thin squad. That said, Bolton's last gasp probably came last weekend when they wasted two first half goal from Matty Taylor and lost three vital points to Arsenal in the rain of the Reebok. After a crushing loss like that, it's hard to factor the Trotters players will have much resolve left, with most of their attention on the mobile phones and agents trying to find a new gig. Let's be honest, who wouldn't want El Hadj Diouf in their squad? Are you listening MLS? ... Aston Villa 2, Bolon 0
* Wigan Athletic v. Birmingham City -- To the dismay of the footballing populace, Wigan can basically move into almost into safety with a win. Brum sits four above the trapdoor into the Championship. Maybe the edge here goes to the hosts, since Steve Bruce managed the opposition and should know some of their tricks. ... Wigan 1, Birmingham City 0
* Blackburn Rovers v. Tottenham -- Meh. Pretty much a nothing game, which could make it pretty entertaining if guys like David Bentley and Aaron Lennon get a little space to operate. Ok, this isn't exactly a nothing game. Blackburn could still make the UEFA Cup, but since they've already applied for the InterToto Cup (double-wonderful) they have a good shot if they don't finish sixth. Anyways, try explaining the InterToto cup to a non-soccer fan sometime and your head just might explode. ... Rovers 2, Spurs 2
* Manchester City v. Chelsea -- (10 a.m., Setanta) Ethical question, if you're Manchester City do you lay down here in order to screw over your cross-city rivals in leaders Manchester United? That shouldn't matter, if City has any pride left they go at it full bore against an angered Chelsea squad returning from Turkey. ... City 1, Chelsea 2
* Fulham v. Sunderland -- (10 a.m., Setanta Broadband) For the upteenth week in a row, Fulham must win to keep its flicking hopes alive. Sunderland broke its massive away losing streak, last week so you'd think two straight road wins might be asking for too much. ... Fulham 1, Sunderland 1
Sunday
* Middlesbrough v. Manchester United -- (8:30 Setanta) 'Boro has impacted the title race, beating Arsenal, tripping up Liverpool. Yet unless Garerth Southgate's gargoyle -like gaze can turn Cristiano Ronaldo to stone the Tessiders aren't mustering much of a speed bump come Sunday. ... 'Boro 0, Manchester United 2
* Everton v. Derby -- (4:30 p.m., FSC delayed) Everton gets a much needed and deserved tomato can after a strong of difficult matches. Question, which team overpays for Derby's Emmanuel Villa over the summer? ... Everton 2, Derby 1
Bonus match: Barnsley v. Cardiff City, FA Cup semifinals (11 a.m., FSC) Take away the cavernous setting at Wembley Stadium, and what's the big difference between the level of play in this match compared to some of MLS, or any second-tier league for that matter?
Last week: 9-1
Season: 162-155
Labels: David Beckham, ESPN sucks, MLS, Prem Picks, Soccer
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