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Stanky Yankee

"It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times?!?" -- Mr. Burns, "Last Exit to Springfield."

No lie, right now I feel like one of those monkey's chained to Mr. Burns'typewriter tasked to write the greatest novel ever written. My mind is going a mile a minute following the U.S. National Team's heart-attack-inducing 2-1 win over El Salvador Saturday night in CONCACAF 2010 qualifying in Sandy, Utah.

So many little things to discuss, dissect and gripe over from this outcome. And of course, big things too, namely new ground broken in the pitiful and pathetic institution that is CONCACAF officiating.

Let's not bury the lead. The big story Saturday is CONCACAF qualifying, in the parlance of Ricky from 'Trailer Park Boys' is "fucked." (Yes, another TPB plug. Netflix it and thank me later.)

The reason this post is going up a little later than usual is I decided that the Mexico/Costa Rica match from Saprissa was a must-watch.

And as it turned out, for El Tri it was a must-win, with Gio Dos Santos telling me, 'Arry, the other haters and the rest of the region to bow down, as he essentially took Mexico off life support by himself in the 3-0 win. (Seriously, this goal was los huevos, right before the half and changed the match and the qualifying scenario for an entire region.)

In short, with three matches left there is everything left on the table for Honduras (13 points), the U.S. (13), Mexico (12) and Costa Rica (12).

There are so many different things that could happen right now, but in short, the U.S. will at worst finish fourth in the CONEMBOL playoff with a win at Trinidad on Wednesday.

Let's, for the sake of time, discuss this after Wednesday. As it stands, it's nothing more than a real-life soccer lottery. (Circle Oct. 10 at Honduras, regardless.)

Moving on.

Let's get the good out of the way first for the U.S.

Admittedly, I fall squarely in the anti-Twitter camp. Yet, I've kept track ... okay, "followed" the exploits of one Jozy Altidore and by defacto "his boy" Charlie Davies. They've been obsessed with their "stanky leg" post game celebration. Google tells me this is what the "Stanky Leg" is, naturally a hip-hop reference. (And where the title of this post originates.)

At this point, it doesn't matter what the details of the one-time 'Unsolved Mystery' are. The combination of Altidore and Davies is something the U.S. can hang its hat on. Other teams have to fear it.

This summer I've truly grown to love the game of Davies.

He has one tangible asset -- speed -- and he's not afraid to use it and make stuff happen on the field. Is the most technical or complete player? No. Again, he always seems to be doing something positive and creating. Moreso, he doesn't play with a blank stare or a fear. He knows he's got the goods and will make other teams pay if they don't respect him. Davies didn't score Saturday night, but he threatened when at times nobody else on the U.S. would.

Gazing into my crystal ball, Davies is going to be a long-time First Division player across Europe. You're telling me a mid-table team in La Liga couldn't utilize Davies at the top of their offense?

And what can you say about Altidore?

He's played all of one full game for Hull City and scores twice in a must-win match for the U.S. Yeah, I'll count that phantom disallowed goal.

On top of that, if you noticed, El Salvador had two guys draped on his back the entire match. Still, he found a way to wriggle free and knock a form header into the net to give the U.S. a much-needed 2-1 lead at the half.

As it stands, Altidore is the one U.S. player with the potential to enter the mythical realm of "beast mode". How well and how fresh his legs are after the Premier League season is anyone's guess, right now though, that's a long time away.

This match cemented the sky is the limit potential of these two guys. (Sadly, after limping off it looks like Davies is a serious doubt for Wednesday. Keep your fingers crossed.)

Okay, that was the good.

Well, not so fast, as my father made sure to call and tell me, the lightning rod of U.S. soccer Landon Donovan once again proved why he is the best player in CONCACAF on a consistent basis. Whether it was his much-maligned delivery to set up each U.S. goal, or just his general ability to dribble in and out of trouble, Donovan never should be questioned again.

Suffice to say, has done the subtle face/heel turn in regard to going from overrated to underrated, or more specifically under appreciated.

All right, all right ... At this point you've probably had enough of the warm and happy, USSF "Kumbaya" version of this post, right?

Let's bullet point the bad.

Jack Warner Please Pick Up the White Courtesy Phone:

This is being written before you skim money off next summer's World Cup tickets. (Rimshot!)

If Jose Pineda and the rest of this crew ever work another U.S. game, Bob Bradley or Sunil Gulati ought to pull the team off the field. Let the guy stick to his mid-level bureaucrat cubicle in Tegucigalpa. (Michael Scott called, he wants his Season 1 hair back.)

Utterly, truly, mind-numbingly horrible.

I felt just as in the dark as "Coach" John Harkes and J.P. Dellacamra as to why Altidore's second goal was waved off. Did we ever get a reason? Was it offside? A foul by Clint Dempsey at midfield after he made the pass to spring Jozy? Martians landing in Rio Tinto Stadium that were only visible to Pineda?

Before typing this and I didn't find an explanation, nor did it seem to be an issue? Or was I the one seeing the Martians?

If anyone knows the deal, please feel free to educate me.

Until then, can we get a ref from non-Quebec Canada to officiate the next U.S. match? Thanks.

The utterly ironic thing about this, somehow in stunning fashion, the refs didn't disallow Dempsey's equalizer for offside when it looked to everyone like it was, when actually Dempsey was the only U.S. player involved in the play that wasn't offside. Amazing. (Hey, El Salvador, friendly suggestion, perhaps your defense on a free kick shouldn't be rushing away and leaving every player unmarked.)

The little girl with the curl:

To borrow yet again from my guru and master, Mike Francesa, Clint Dempsey is that proverbial little girl for the U.S.

When he's good, he's good, but when he's bad he's bad.

In a nutshell of Dempsey's game, in the 64th he broke away from the entire El Salvador defense and had a dream 1-v-1 with the keeper and what's he do? Shoot it right at him. (For the anti-Dempsey finish on a breakaway, how about James McFadden's dream goal at rain-soaked Hampden in Scotland's key 2-0 win over FYR Macedonia. Top drawer.)

Dempsey is a amazingly useful player when he's rushing into the box attempting to finish off movements. He's got an absolute knack for getting goals inside the area -- see his equalizer set up by Donovan's free kick.

When he's stuck out in right midfield he fails to make any impact or gives the ball away or simply fades into the background.

Looking how Wednesday is shaping up, Bradley ought to consider starting him at forward and Stuart Holden on the right side. It seems a more natural fit in this team for both guys. Soup-to-nuts, Dempsey is a better player than Holden, but Holden offers the U.S. a more balanced team.

I know I might get slayed for this comparison, but Dempsey really is to the U.S. what Zlatan Ibrahimovic is to the Sweden national team. Granted, they're nowhere near on the same technical skill level, but both remain total enigma's for their respective countries. And for the U.S. or Sweden to be really dangerous, they need to show up and play -- Saturday both scored massively important goals.

Frankly, I just don't know any more about Dempsey. Guess Bradley has to roll the dice and hope he rolls the good Deuce.

American? No Swiss:

* I'll admit it, I eat at Subway waaaaaay more often than I should. What can I do? I literally drive past one about three times a day back-and-forth during my day-to-day toutines.

I never, I mean never opt for anything other than the American cheese. No Swiss here.

That said, what's up with the U.S. defense?

If you had the over in how many times Tim Howard will scream at this defense -- you win.

The El Salvador goal gifted to Christian Castillo was a textbook version of what not to do. Can we close down, please? The shank by Jonathan Bornstein gave me flashbacks to Oguchi Onyewu's ball that set up Tomas Rosicky's dagger in Gelsenkirchen. Ugh.

Granted Onyewu and Jay DeMerit were out, so the effort to hang on was commendable and valiant to some degree by Carlos Bocanegra and Chad Marshall. Let's just hope this was like Jay-Z sitting in with Phish -- a one-night only engagement.

You'd think the one thing American defenders would have ingrained inside them is hoofing the ball away as hard as they can, right? I was definitely in the dreaded Sir Alex Ferguson "sticky bum time" for the final 20 minutes of this match.

Other stuff:

* El Salvador, I'll hand it to you guys, better than I expected. If El Salvador possesed a natural goal-scoring poacher or a player with any finishing touch, they'd be a lot more dangerous. Think a vintage Paulo Wanchope for Costa Rica back in the day.

* That said, coach Carlos de los Cobos looks like he's be more at home in the product-placement kitchen of 'Top Chef' than the soccer coaching box.

* According to the esteemed Pedro Gomez, los Cobos was pissed off with the extra time in the first half where Altidore scored what proved to be the winner. Well, news flash buddy, don't have your keeper fake an injury (my cynical take) a minute after you score to go ahead. Just a thought.

* I made it this far without writing anything about Brian Ching. Hooray!

* Minor miracle of the night, as bad as the officiating was, the U.S. didn't get any yellow cards and nobody will be suspended for Wednesday. The night's big upset, in my book.

* Benny Feilhaber ... very positive tonight. Not an all-timer Saturday, but filled a role competently.

* Sorry, the same can't be said about Michael Bradley III, err, Jonathan Bornstein. Long story short, nice little MLSer, not nearly on the international caliber.

* On the subject of Howard, he was really caught out of place on the El Salvador goal. At least he redeemed himself with a crucial save in the 87th.

* Bringing in Jose Torres in the the 85th for Altidore made me scratch my head. He hadn't played for the U.S. since June. Wouldn't you know it, he came within an amazing save of scoring on a rocket header?

Torres ought to listen to the chorus of 'The Wicker Man' by Iron Maiden, because your time will cooooooome. It probably won't be until 2014, so hang in there.

* One of the hallmarks hailed by analysts of the U.S. at the Confederations Cup was its fitness levels through the entire 90 minutes. Maybe it was me, but the U.S. was dragging at the end of this. Altitude?

* Davies, give Wayne Rooney a ring and see if his oxygen tent is available for the next days. We're gonna need you, buddy.

* Painting your chest like the U.S. flag before attending the match? A little too much pre-production for my likings. Just show up and yell at the other team and its fans. We all don't need to be David Putty.

Closing thought:

Three points, must keep telling myself three points. ... Three points the hard way.

You can say the U.S. looked shaky defensively yet again, and fell behind early, yet again and now face a tricky match with fatigued legs in Port-of-Spain.

Or, you can be happy the team showed enough resiliency and guts to rally back with two quick answers and then hang on by the short and curlies in the final 20 minutes of the match.

Me? Why do I have this burning feeling in my stomach about Wednesday night? I thought the kings of the one-run game -- my Detroit Tigers -- would kill me this summer with stress, not the U.S. qualifying for the World Cup. (Then again, other than Brazil, making a World Cup is nobody's birthright.)

Wonder if ESPN will find it worthy to show any of the highlights or drag Alexi Lalas out to talk about the importance of what went down in the region Saturday? Oh wait, its the opening weekend of NCAA football, so everything else must take a back seat while Michigan beats up on some chump school looking for a paycheck.

Well, ESPN, we'll always have June.

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11 Responses to “Stanky Yankee”

  1. # Blogger macarthur31

    Great stuff, Cardillo.

    I think at best, Dempsey can be like Everton's Tim Cahill. Terrific attacking midfielder, who could play up top in a pinch -- nose for goal and can surprise int he air. However, that means he's gotta be more central.

    No words on Spector? I've found his service to be quite good. I know 'Dolo has the service time, but is it too soon to pencil him in?

    I don't think anyone outside of the Davies family saw this coming. A year ago, Charlie Davies was playing up at Hammarby, and was having a hard time breaking into the U-23 lineup in Beijing. I agree that now he's become a key part of the first team plan. Who's next? I'd like to say Paco Torres - I like his composure on the ball, and with first team play in the Primera, he can only go up right? However, that means that he'd have to unseat Baby Bradley (that ain't happening), or Benny (less likely, but in the realm of possibility.)  

  2. # Blogger Jeff

    I'm done with Bornstein. He's can't cross, he can't mark, he obviously can't clear. Every time he got the ball, the give away was not far behind.

    Speaking of give away, I'm done with Dempsey. He can finish inside the 6, but that's about it. He doesn't track back on defense and he always gives the ball away in a bad area. El Salvador was practically running a freeway down his flank.  

  3. # Blogger Jeff

    And possibly I'm the only one that cares about US player pool additions, but 22-year old Edgar Castillo has been declared available to the US. (He's a left-back!)  

  4. # Blogger Robert

    As exciting as the lineup was, that makeshift back 4 and the Bradley/Feilhaber midfield was just unable to control the game to the extent they needed to. For a player involved in so many tough challenges and rough plays, Bradley is curiously ineffective at actually breaking up attacks and holding the ball. He ran like a dog box to box, though.

    Bornstein was horrendous!

    Donovan was immense in the first half. Really on top of his game, moving well, passing beautifully and driving the attack.

    That game was like a fight between two pure punchers. Even when they had the lead, the toothless midfield denied the US a jab to allow them to control the pace of the fight. And their lack of a good defense meant that they were always a slight slip away from armageddon.

    Happy to have 3 points that I don't know that we totally deserved.

    Oh, and great CONCACAF officiating once again. I did love the justice of scoring deep into stoppage time that only existed because of the Salvadoran GK's bull$hit histrionics.  

  5. # Anonymous Steve

    Great post.

    As for Bornstein, Castillo cannot come fast enough.

    I actually thought that Feilhaber had a great game. For much of the time in the first half and some of the second, he controlled the tempo of the game. He calmed the U.S. errant passes, look to play the forwards to their feet (a revelation) and switched the field of play quite well.

    The only problem is Bradley the Younger giving away the ball on his every touch. That sort of slowed them down a bit.

    I would really, really like to see a Feilhaber-Torres midfield pairing, but I know Bob would have a nervous breakdown without a precious "holding" midfielder.

    Also, it really is nice to have a player up top with some speed, it adds a new dimension to the attack.  

  6. # Blogger 30f

    When is three points not three points? When goal differential is likely to end up being very significant, that's when. With Mexico adding a +3 to their GD, the US might have slipped a bit farther behind. The final Concacaf standings may be decided on GD, so lets hope a lack of goal scoring at home against the weaker teams doesn't 'win' the US team a home and home with Messi and friends.

    Yes, SLV is a weaker team. The announcers were talking about one of the Salvadoran midfielders playing for a SECOND division Mexican club. This kind of team, at f&^%ing HOME should be when the US is scoring goals for fun and looking good.

    Saturday evening in Utah, the US did not look good. The players (except Lando) looked gassed by the end and that open, sloppy game could have netted a few extra goals to pad the score line - but it didn't. I agree with those that put much of the blame on our midfield and their lack of consistency. Bradley and Dempsey are both inconsistent - Bradley so much so that he seems to have been dropped by Borussia Munchengladbach. I wonder how that 'must be playing first team club football' rule will apply to The Younger if that lack of Bundes-minutes continues? Anyway, Dempsey can be a maestro at times - then he can also be a petulant foul machine seemingly *trying* to get a card as he scowls at the ref. I don't think two of the four midfielders (Deuce and the Younger) can be this inconsistent if the team expects consistent results. Like packing a baseball line-up with too many feast-or-famine strike-out prone sluggers, the uneven play by US MFs can often leave us with nothing.

    Next match, the USMNT might seem like the squad that beat Spain in he Confed Cup. Or maybe not. Yeah some backline players were missing at Rio Tinto, but is this a US team that can/should expect to get out of their group in South Africa next summer? I guess we will all have our fingers crossed come December for that group draw and see what our chances are - that seems like THE most important day in the 2010 World Cup for the US.  

  7. # Blogger Shane

    This match against Trinidad is a must-win. Our final two games are rough: away Honduras, home Costa Rica. We'll get somebody (probably Honduras) to drop points on wednesday as Mexico is home to Honduras. After that ours is the tough schedule and everyone else has it cake besides playing us.

    Mexico has gone from most likely to take 4th to most likely to take 1st thanks to Geovanni (holy crap he looked good last night. Amazing goal and then 2 assists on the break. Costa Rica was terrible. Not one good chance on goal). If Mexico takes care of business at home on Wednesday then pencil them in as someone we aren't fighting for 3rd with. They finish with Trinidad and El Salvador.

    Our hope is that Mexico clobbers Honduras and El Salvador pulls off a draw or lucky win at home against a suddenly reeling Costa Rica side. If we could get a tie in Honduras then the final match at home to Costa Rica might not even matter.  

  8. # Anonymous Camoranesi's Mom

    Just for the record, there are two Gs in "Stanky Legg", as I noted after the Grenada game in July.


    http://thatsonpoint.blogspot.com/2009/07/gre-nada.html#comments  

  9. # Anonymous lokibeat

    Unfortunately, I'm of an age where Stanky Legg simply puzzles me. But thanks to Cardillo, I've gone from thinking Davies and Altidore looked like idiots with the post goal celebration to now thinking they're just morons. "Ah, utes today."

    I listen to/read entirely too much soccer coverage. I've now had like three different summaries of this game. Each quite varied in their take aways. Good thing I saw the game myself. I agree with the post. The most important thing that will influence how far we'll get in South Africa (yes, I'm safely assuming we'll get there) is the draw. We're not going to get seeded, so good luck trying to get through an Italy and Ghana this year. 3 and out. Sorry.  

  10. # Blogger 30f

    Mostly interesting interview with The Elder by Grant Wahl.  

  11. # Blogger J. Dunn

    I'm not sure why seeding or not-seeding matters that much for us for the WC. We're almost never going to be a top-8 team, but that doesn't mean we have to end up with a killer group like Italy, Czech, Ghana every time. Costa Rica got Germany, Poland, Ecuador last time. That would have been way more manageable than what we got. T&T got a better draw too. Ukraine got an amazing draw. None of them were seeded either. We just got unlucky that time around, and I'm not sure why everyone thought not making it out of that group was such a disaster. The manner in which we went down was kind of crappy, but the results themselves were not exactly surprising. We had the eventual champion, another very-skilled-but-aging European side, and the best team in Africa. If we get a draw that bad in 2010, I won't be surprised if we fail to go through again. But you're not going to get that bad of a draw every single time, seeded or no.  

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