Well, folks, it was bound to happen.
It only took about seven weeks, but we've finally hit a truly dud weekend in the Premier League.
No matches contested between the 'Big Four' or 'Fringe Two' (City/Spurs). No really big derby matches, unless you want to count Fulham hosting Arsenal, but that's more of a one-way rivalry.
In a lot of ways, this weekend is like those god-awful weeks of Interleague play in Major League Baseball, except its not the Cubs playing the White Sox or Mets hosting the Yankees, instead think of the times when the Marlins play the Mariners or some other figment of Bud Selig's imagination.
Instead of lamenting the lack of quality match-ups for neutrals, why not take a measuring stick at roughly the 15 percent mark of the season, or at least identify some trends. (Or, just call this, 'Mike Has Fun With Numbers.')
* There have only been four draws, with Stoke City the only team with one than one.
* Spurs are one of three teams to fail to keep a cleansheet (Portsmouth, Bolton), yet sit in the top six of the table.
* By my calculations 159 goals have been scored in 56 matches, good for a 2.8 average per game.
* Chelsea, Aston Villa, Manchester City and Liverpool are the only clubs to score in every match.
* Portsmouth and Birmingham City have just three goals each, while Fulham, Blackburn and Wigan only have four. Egads.
* According to the near mythical Actim Ratings, Didier Drogba has been the best player in the league -- by a nearly 30-point margin over Wayne Rooney. (Form your own conclusions.)
Okay, those are some stat nuggets to chew on. Here are some other general impressions:
* Chelsea, could, stress could, have the title wrapped up by Christmas. Hear me out. The Blues play Liverpool and Aston Villa in back-to-back weeks to start October, then get Manchester United at Stamford Bridge in mid-November, followed with back-to-back matches at Arsenal and at Manchester City. If the Blue take 12 or more points from those five games, who is going to be able to keep up with them and or slow them down?
* Assuming they don't self-combust, (see Bellamy, Craig; Adebayor, Emmanuel) Manchester City has the better chance to break into the top four than Tottenham, which remains too fragile mentality and won't be able to adequately replace Luka Modric. The one thing worth watching for City is its mental resolve, too. So far they've seen to be a team that plays up or down to its competition far too much. It's one thing to fly high vs. Arsenal at home and at Old Trafford on a derby day, but can they grind out points in the dreary winter months at places like the Reebok and St. Andrews?
* Liverpool is stagnant. I feel like I've written this 1,000 times if once, but it all boils down to Steven Gerrard and Fernando Torres. How long can two players carry a team in the toughest league in the world? Yes, Dirk Kuyt and Yossi Benayoun have been useful recently and Glenn Johnson a revelation, but what happens when the fixtures start to build up and the legs get tired?
On the plus side, the Reds have smacked Stoke City and Burnley 4-0 at Anfield, yet there seems to be too many matches like last week's 3-2 win at West Ham. It's never easy for Liverpool, like it is for Chelsea.
Liverpool's season will choose a course, soon, when it plays Chelsea, Manchester United and at Fulham, plus a Champions League match vs. Lyon for good measure.
* At this point the teams with "no juice" are: Portsmouth, Hull, Blackburn, Wigan and Bolton. At best these guys are fighting for 17th place. Burnley, depending on home form, and Birmingham City can easily join them. Maybe I should crib from the Bill Simmons playbook and label this the Alain Perrin Division. (We'll revisit this idea soon.)
* It's just not going to happen for Everton this season.
* Gap? What gap? Oh right, the big one. Here's your 'Big Four', so far. Chelsea hasn't dropped a point. United lost a fluky game at Burnley for its only blemish. Liverpool has lost to Aston Villa and Tottenham, which sit fourth and fifth in the table. Arsenal's two losses are to Manchester City and Manchester United.
Whatever PL Chief Richard Scudamore wants to say, there is a massive, repeat, massive gap between the haves and have nots.
It would be stunning if the aforementioned teams don't finish 1-7, in some order, come May.
Good thing? Bad thing? It simply is what it is at this point.
Saturday:
* Portsmouth v. Everton -- (Live, ESPN2, 7:30 a.m.) Oh wouldn't both sets of supporters like to turn back the clock to 2007? This should at least be a good judge on the future of Pompey. Will the fans turn their backs on this collection of cast-offs? Or will it be "Play up Pompey" for 90 minutes? Everton and David Moyes likely won't care too much if they win it likely costs Paul Hart his job. ... Portsmouth 1, Everton 2
* Birmingham City v. Bolton -- I couldn't think of a better advertisement for the merits of the Premier League than this match. Joking aside, it'll be sad to see Carson Yueng take over Birmingham City because anytime you lose a porn magnate as owner (David Gold) the whole world weeps. ... Birmingham City 1, Bolton 0
* Blackburn Rovers v. Aston Villa -- Four-straight wins have Villa in the same place as Manchester City in the table -- with the game goal differential to boot! The reason for Villa's rise from the opening-day dead? Set pieces, as they lead the league with six so far. Rovers manager Sam Allardyce must be jealous. Also, Gabby Agbonlahor has netted in three straight, it seems how he goes, Villa goes. So fans of the claret and blue best hope he can continue this past September. On a side note, most fans of the Cleveland Browns probably wish Randy Lerner would banish coach Eric Mangini to some abandoned factory in Birmingham right about now. ... Blackburn 1, Aston Villa 2
* Liverpool v. Hull City -- (Live, FSC, 10 a.m.) It pains me to do this to my boy Jozy, but Hull City might be the worst team in the league. They've allowed 13 goals -- worst in the league -- and only committed the most fouls for good measure. The Tigers haven't scored more than one goal in a game and have basically lived off their great start from 2008 for the last 13 months. So long story short, this is a nice match for the embattled Liverpool defense to catch a breather. ... Liverpool 3, Hull City 0
* Stoke City v. Manchester United -- (Live, Setanta, 10 a.m.) On paper this looks like a classic letdown game for Manchester United, right? Then again, the Red Devils did just skate by in the midweek in the Carling Cup, so maybe that offsets that. Either way, it won't be easy for Sir Alex to coax three points out at the Britianna Stadium. This should be a good test of United's suddenly suspect defense, especially Ben Foster in goal. Something tells me the combo of Rory Delap's long tosses and Foster is like throwing a match on a canister of gasoline, or in this case, petrol. Still, United have a little too much quality to fall short here. ... Stoke City 1, Manchester United 2
* Tottenham v. Burnley -- This would appear like a perfect match for Spurs to figure out their identity without Luka Modric since Burnley aren't exactly dynamos away from Turf Moor. For Spurs to be taken seriously, three points are must here. Jermain Defoe and Aaron Lennon should be good enough for a pair, right? ... Spurs 2, Burnley 0
* Wigan Athletic v. Chelsea -- If you're a team like Wigan, do you like having back-to-back matches vs. 'Big Four' opposition and take your lumps and move on, or do you prefer a more frequent and balanced beating schedule? Realistically, other than planting some land mines around the JJB (or whatever its called this weekend) is the Latics only shot against the Blue Machine. ... Wigan 0, Chelsea 3
* Fulham v. Arsenal -- (Live, FSC, 12:30 p.m.) Roy Hodgson's men could should signs of life here that they're a team to reckon with, at least at Craven Cottage. Through the first month of the season, Fulham has been decidedly 'meh'-worthy. Arsenal, on the other hand, seem to be gaining steam. Odd Arsenal stat, the Gunner's central defensive starters (Gallas/Vermaelen) have more goals (5) than the starting forward rotation of Robin van Persie, Eduardo and Nicklas Bendtner (2). So there's concrete proof right there that Arsene Wenger made the right call not to pry Brede Hangeland away from Fulham. ... Fulham 1, Arsenal 3
Sunday:
* Sunderland v. Wolves -- (Live, FSC, 11 a.m.) Since I don't have much to offer here, a couple stats. The first, Sunderland has played six games with keeper Craig Gordon and Martin Fulop splitting the starts. Each have made seven saves, Gordon allowing four goals; Fulop three. And three is the number of players who've scored this season for Sunderland (Darren Bent, Kenwyne Jones, Andy Reid). Wolves, admittedly, are the one team in the division I haven't really seen play extensively. ... Sunderland 2, Wolves 0
Monday:
* Manchester City v. West Ham United -- (Live, ESPN2, 3 p.m.) Let's see if this one can live up to the inaugural ESPN Monday afternoon-er, when Aston Villa won at Anfield. Let;s hope both sides feel like putting on a show. ... Manchester City 3, West Ham 1
Last week: 7-3
Season: 33-23
It only took about seven weeks, but we've finally hit a truly dud weekend in the Premier League.
No matches contested between the 'Big Four' or 'Fringe Two' (City/Spurs). No really big derby matches, unless you want to count Fulham hosting Arsenal, but that's more of a one-way rivalry.
In a lot of ways, this weekend is like those god-awful weeks of Interleague play in Major League Baseball, except its not the Cubs playing the White Sox or Mets hosting the Yankees, instead think of the times when the Marlins play the Mariners or some other figment of Bud Selig's imagination.
Instead of lamenting the lack of quality match-ups for neutrals, why not take a measuring stick at roughly the 15 percent mark of the season, or at least identify some trends. (Or, just call this, 'Mike Has Fun With Numbers.')
* There have only been four draws, with Stoke City the only team with one than one.
* Spurs are one of three teams to fail to keep a cleansheet (Portsmouth, Bolton), yet sit in the top six of the table.
* By my calculations 159 goals have been scored in 56 matches, good for a 2.8 average per game.
* Chelsea, Aston Villa, Manchester City and Liverpool are the only clubs to score in every match.
* Portsmouth and Birmingham City have just three goals each, while Fulham, Blackburn and Wigan only have four. Egads.
* According to the near mythical Actim Ratings, Didier Drogba has been the best player in the league -- by a nearly 30-point margin over Wayne Rooney. (Form your own conclusions.)
Okay, those are some stat nuggets to chew on. Here are some other general impressions:
* Chelsea, could, stress could, have the title wrapped up by Christmas. Hear me out. The Blues play Liverpool and Aston Villa in back-to-back weeks to start October, then get Manchester United at Stamford Bridge in mid-November, followed with back-to-back matches at Arsenal and at Manchester City. If the Blue take 12 or more points from those five games, who is going to be able to keep up with them and or slow them down?
* Assuming they don't self-combust, (see Bellamy, Craig; Adebayor, Emmanuel) Manchester City has the better chance to break into the top four than Tottenham, which remains too fragile mentality and won't be able to adequately replace Luka Modric. The one thing worth watching for City is its mental resolve, too. So far they've seen to be a team that plays up or down to its competition far too much. It's one thing to fly high vs. Arsenal at home and at Old Trafford on a derby day, but can they grind out points in the dreary winter months at places like the Reebok and St. Andrews?
* Liverpool is stagnant. I feel like I've written this 1,000 times if once, but it all boils down to Steven Gerrard and Fernando Torres. How long can two players carry a team in the toughest league in the world? Yes, Dirk Kuyt and Yossi Benayoun have been useful recently and Glenn Johnson a revelation, but what happens when the fixtures start to build up and the legs get tired?
On the plus side, the Reds have smacked Stoke City and Burnley 4-0 at Anfield, yet there seems to be too many matches like last week's 3-2 win at West Ham. It's never easy for Liverpool, like it is for Chelsea.
Liverpool's season will choose a course, soon, when it plays Chelsea, Manchester United and at Fulham, plus a Champions League match vs. Lyon for good measure.
* At this point the teams with "no juice" are: Portsmouth, Hull, Blackburn, Wigan and Bolton. At best these guys are fighting for 17th place. Burnley, depending on home form, and Birmingham City can easily join them. Maybe I should crib from the Bill Simmons playbook and label this the Alain Perrin Division. (We'll revisit this idea soon.)
* It's just not going to happen for Everton this season.
* Gap? What gap? Oh right, the big one. Here's your 'Big Four', so far. Chelsea hasn't dropped a point. United lost a fluky game at Burnley for its only blemish. Liverpool has lost to Aston Villa and Tottenham, which sit fourth and fifth in the table. Arsenal's two losses are to Manchester City and Manchester United.
Whatever PL Chief Richard Scudamore wants to say, there is a massive, repeat, massive gap between the haves and have nots.
It would be stunning if the aforementioned teams don't finish 1-7, in some order, come May.
Good thing? Bad thing? It simply is what it is at this point.
Saturday:
* Portsmouth v. Everton -- (Live, ESPN2, 7:30 a.m.) Oh wouldn't both sets of supporters like to turn back the clock to 2007? This should at least be a good judge on the future of Pompey. Will the fans turn their backs on this collection of cast-offs? Or will it be "Play up Pompey" for 90 minutes? Everton and David Moyes likely won't care too much if they win it likely costs Paul Hart his job. ... Portsmouth 1, Everton 2
* Birmingham City v. Bolton -- I couldn't think of a better advertisement for the merits of the Premier League than this match. Joking aside, it'll be sad to see Carson Yueng take over Birmingham City because anytime you lose a porn magnate as owner (David Gold) the whole world weeps. ... Birmingham City 1, Bolton 0
* Blackburn Rovers v. Aston Villa -- Four-straight wins have Villa in the same place as Manchester City in the table -- with the game goal differential to boot! The reason for Villa's rise from the opening-day dead? Set pieces, as they lead the league with six so far. Rovers manager Sam Allardyce must be jealous. Also, Gabby Agbonlahor has netted in three straight, it seems how he goes, Villa goes. So fans of the claret and blue best hope he can continue this past September. On a side note, most fans of the Cleveland Browns probably wish Randy Lerner would banish coach Eric Mangini to some abandoned factory in Birmingham right about now. ... Blackburn 1, Aston Villa 2
* Liverpool v. Hull City -- (Live, FSC, 10 a.m.) It pains me to do this to my boy Jozy, but Hull City might be the worst team in the league. They've allowed 13 goals -- worst in the league -- and only committed the most fouls for good measure. The Tigers haven't scored more than one goal in a game and have basically lived off their great start from 2008 for the last 13 months. So long story short, this is a nice match for the embattled Liverpool defense to catch a breather. ... Liverpool 3, Hull City 0
* Stoke City v. Manchester United -- (Live, Setanta, 10 a.m.) On paper this looks like a classic letdown game for Manchester United, right? Then again, the Red Devils did just skate by in the midweek in the Carling Cup, so maybe that offsets that. Either way, it won't be easy for Sir Alex to coax three points out at the Britianna Stadium. This should be a good test of United's suddenly suspect defense, especially Ben Foster in goal. Something tells me the combo of Rory Delap's long tosses and Foster is like throwing a match on a canister of gasoline, or in this case, petrol. Still, United have a little too much quality to fall short here. ... Stoke City 1, Manchester United 2
* Tottenham v. Burnley -- This would appear like a perfect match for Spurs to figure out their identity without Luka Modric since Burnley aren't exactly dynamos away from Turf Moor. For Spurs to be taken seriously, three points are must here. Jermain Defoe and Aaron Lennon should be good enough for a pair, right? ... Spurs 2, Burnley 0
* Wigan Athletic v. Chelsea -- If you're a team like Wigan, do you like having back-to-back matches vs. 'Big Four' opposition and take your lumps and move on, or do you prefer a more frequent and balanced beating schedule? Realistically, other than planting some land mines around the JJB (or whatever its called this weekend) is the Latics only shot against the Blue Machine. ... Wigan 0, Chelsea 3
* Fulham v. Arsenal -- (Live, FSC, 12:30 p.m.) Roy Hodgson's men could should signs of life here that they're a team to reckon with, at least at Craven Cottage. Through the first month of the season, Fulham has been decidedly 'meh'-worthy. Arsenal, on the other hand, seem to be gaining steam. Odd Arsenal stat, the Gunner's central defensive starters (Gallas/Vermaelen) have more goals (5) than the starting forward rotation of Robin van Persie, Eduardo and Nicklas Bendtner (2). So there's concrete proof right there that Arsene Wenger made the right call not to pry Brede Hangeland away from Fulham. ... Fulham 1, Arsenal 3
Sunday:
* Sunderland v. Wolves -- (Live, FSC, 11 a.m.) Since I don't have much to offer here, a couple stats. The first, Sunderland has played six games with keeper Craig Gordon and Martin Fulop splitting the starts. Each have made seven saves, Gordon allowing four goals; Fulop three. And three is the number of players who've scored this season for Sunderland (Darren Bent, Kenwyne Jones, Andy Reid). Wolves, admittedly, are the one team in the division I haven't really seen play extensively. ... Sunderland 2, Wolves 0
Monday:
* Manchester City v. West Ham United -- (Live, ESPN2, 3 p.m.) Let's see if this one can live up to the inaugural ESPN Monday afternoon-er, when Aston Villa won at Anfield. Let;s hope both sides feel like putting on a show. ... Manchester City 3, West Ham 1
Last week: 7-3
Season: 33-23
Labels: English Premier League, Prem Picks, Soccer



I believe that Arsenal has scored in every Prem match thus far.
I feel like I should offer up some defense of Fulham, but your assessment seems quite accurate. They got lots of juice (and a few points) out of big wins at the Cottage, but they have showed none of that spark so far this season.
I will dispute that Hull are the worst team in the Premiership. That 'honoUr' goes to Portsmouth, and by a mile.
This was always my hesitation for Jozy going to Hull. If a team sucks, they will keep switching the line-up and the forwards are the most likely to be moved around - even if no one can judge the forwards since the attackers can never get the ball from their embattled defense and midfielders. If/When Hull's Tanager goes - then the young/new player might be left adrift (ala a certain Ghanaian/American youngster in Portugal) as the replacement manager goes with 'tried and true' players in an attempt to stave off relegation.
To prove how much more likely attacking players are to be the ones switched out - see Onyewu in Milan. The AC Milan defense has been craptacular and Gooch has STILL not even got a run-out - even in a mid-week Italian Cup match that Milan lost 0-1. Is it progress that Gooch at least made the bench for that one?
If this trend continues, next summer's US team will be Timmay, Deuce and Charlie D plus the MLS All Stars - since no other Euro-based players will have had any first team games. And that is Bradley the Elder's big criteria, right?
As a Villa fan, please please PLEASE tell me I dreamt that 2-0 home loss to Wigan on matchday one.
Hindsight being 20/20, that Onyewu move was a pretty bad decisino, eh? I was a little skeptical about him getting playing time at first, but ended up drinking the Kool Aid so to speak. I guess we should have seen it for what it was -- a PR move. Signing a CB who helped keep a clean sheet against Spain would be easy to sell to the Milan faithful as improvement. Signing an American during the World Football Challenge would help sell jerseys. If he works out, great. If not, well...